Kiss Me
by Tori Lynn Leblanc
Summary: When things begin to get hot between Souji and Yosuke, other things are heating up as well. Dreams are like reality, and sometimes, you wish reality was a dream. Souji/Yosuke-centric, with some Souji/Yukiko, Souji/Chie, & very slight Yosuke/Saki.
1. Chapter 1

**This is the sequel to my Souji/Yosuke oneshot **_**Hit Me**_**. You probably don't need to read it to know what's going on here, but it's an option. This version is both shiny and new, completely improved since I began writing it in 2009!**

I reached out and stroked his cheek light and managed to make him sigh with content. Seeing him every day was nice, but it wasn't enough. I wanted to be able to see him all the time—to hold him and to never have to part. But I had to go home to Nanako and Dojima, and leaving was never fun.

"Yosuke, I have to go now," I told him, cringing at the disappointment in his face.

"I know…" Yosuke said, putting his hand on his heart. "But it kills me to see you go, you know." He was being purposefully melodramatic, I could tell, and I chuckled softly.

I pressed my lips to his and felt him immediately start to kiss back, and I smiled into the kiss and slowly pulled away.

"Souji…" Yosuke whispered, his eyes still closed, his lips still stretched out to meet mine.

"I love you, Yosuke," I said gently.

"I love you too," Yosuke said in a voice so quiet it was barely audible.

"Adieu," I said smoothly and with a smile on my face, grabbing his hand and beginning to walk toward the front door, our hands slipping apart slowly until they were no longer touching.

"Bye…" Yosuke said quietly.

I opened the door to his house and stepped out slowly, shutting the door behind me and dreading the walk home. I lived quite a distance away from my boyfriend; he lived near Junes and I lived on the very edge of Inaba with my uncle and cousin.

I began walking. It had been a pretty great month for Yosuke and I; we were able to completely open up to each other about how we felt. But even though we loved each other—and there was no other way to say it—we could never build up the courage to tell Chie, Yukiko, and everyone else. The only person we told was Kanji because we thought he'd understand, and he did. I smiled into the setting sun upon remembering Kanji's reaction when we first told him. He was definitely in shock at first, completely caught off-guard that both of his senpais were gay, but he was happy for us.

After that, I spent the rest of the walk home thinking about Yosuke. He'd been trying to seduce me quite often the last week or so—about two days ago I'd asked him why he'd been so seductive lately, only to get a loving French kiss that made me quiver. Later, though, he came right out and said that he wanted to have sex with me. I was amazed and shocked at the same time, rendered nearly speechless.

I reached my front door and wiped the sweat from my forehead. The summer heat was a killer, but we were on break, so I could spend nearly every day with Yosuke—and most days, I did.

I turned the doorknob and pushed the door open, and Nanako looked up immediately.

"Oh! Welcome home, big bro!" she said happily upon seeing that it was me.

"Hi, Nanako," I said, smiling at her. I wasn't hungry, but I was rather tired, so I decided to go to bed early that night.

Laying on my futon, I thought about what sex with Yosuke would be like. I could imagine him beneath me, crying out in pleasure as I touched him and hit all the right spots, and I found myself getting quite warm underneath my covers. I quietly reached my hand under the elastic of my pajama pants and let my mind fuck Yosuke in whatever way it wanted while I touched myself to the images.

**This fanfic is going to be pretty risqué compared to **_**Hit Me**_**, the prequel. It's rated M for smut and language. Let me know what you think so far; review! If you're rereading this after reading the first version, let me know how you like the updated version. Hahah. Thanks~!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two, the updated version! It combines the old chapter two and three, because three was too damn short. :) Here it is! Hope you enjoy it. REVIEW, PLEASE, OR DIE. :D**

The next day the entire crew decided to gather at the Junes food court just to hang out. After some debate over what to get, we ordered what we wanted for lunch and decided to just sit and talk for a while.

I sat with Yosuke on my left and Teddie on my right, wanting to be able to reach out and hold my boyfriend's hand over the table, but I wasn't ready for the rest of our friends to know about us, so I settled for occasionally rubbing his leg under the table and holding his hand where no one could see. Suddenly Yosuke stood up.

"I gotta pee. Back in a sec," he said casually, pushing in his chair and beginning to walk away. He shot me a glance that told me to follow him and I rose from my seat too.

"I gotta go, too," I said, following Yosuke toward the bathrooms, while Chie made a face.

"Wow, _gay_! Thanks for the info!" she called after us in a moderately disgusted—yet slightly sarcastic—tone.

The bathroom was on the complete opposite side of the food court, and accessed by going up the outside stairs to the second floor. It was quite a walk, but I knew we weren't _actually_ going to the bathroom. We climbed a staircase, but when we reached the outside 2nd flood, we didn't stop.

"Where are we going?" I asked, reaching out ahead of me and grabbing Yosuke's hand, lacing our fingers.

"My favorite spot at Junes," he replied with a smile, relaxing his hand in mine.

"Oh." I followed him closely up the stairs until we reached a very quaint little floor. It was outside and shaded by the floor above, and there were flowers in pots strewn about the small balcony, which was probably only about five by seven feet. It was crowded with the two of us and the various flora, but it was cute, and I definitely didn't mind being so close to Yosuke.

He smirked as I ruffled his hair and I smiled and moved my lips to his slowly, holding still for a moment before taking full control of the kiss.

I licked his lower lip, asking for entrance to his mouth, and was granted it when he parted his lips slightly. I slipped my tongue in, and when I'd thought it was going to be an easy victory for me, I was proven wrong; Yosuke began to fight back. We wrestled tongues like that for awhile, losing track of time, until we heard a shriek that seemed to come from nowhere at first.

"Eeee!" The high-pitched noise came from the staircase leading to the balcony we were standing on. Yosuke was facing away from the staircase, so he couldn't immediately see what was going on. I didn't realize it at first either, though. We were both too busy desperately grasping at each other's bodies and kissing.

I opened my eyes when I heard the shriek and immediately pulled my lips from Yosuke's. We were a few inches apart now and I knew he could see my eyes widen at the person who'd uttered the shriek.

There stood Yukiko, her face red and her hand over her mouth, looking as if she could faint at any moment.

I unwrapped my arms from Yosuke's skinny figure, both our faces red with embarrassment. Yosuke had figured out by now what was going on and who'd shrieked.

"Umm… Y-Yukiko…" I started, my voice quivering from worry and embarrassment—and from the intensity of the kiss as well.

"Yukiko…" Yosuke began, but Yukiko must've been shocked absolutely out of her mind because she just turned around quickly and bolted down the flights of stairs.

"Oh my god," I groaned, looking at Yosuke and shaking my head. "What if she tells the others?"

"Do you think she would?" Yosuke asked, making a face at the thought of our friends finding out about our little secret.

I honestly wasn't sure, but I pecked him on the lips gently. "It'll be fine," I told him. We began kissing again, but I pulled away like the first time. "We need to follow her," I whispered.

"Yeah," he agreed reluctantly.

We started to run down the stairs; I led the way. We reached the flat ground of the first floor and ran around the Junes building to where Yukiko was standing at the table with all our friends, a horrified look on her face as she spoke frantically to the group. They all had shocked looks on their faces—all except for Kanji, who looked worried.

"…and they had their hands all over each other," we heard as we approached the table.

We came upon the group slowly, each one of them turning their heads and eyes to us. I gulped and tried to speak.

"What's going on…?" I asked, blinking slowly and taking a deep breath.

"Senpai! Are you and Yosuke really…?" Rise asked, looking scared. The rest of the group looked at us expectantly, waiting for an answer.

"Well, umm…" Yosuke started, fidgeting nervously.

Teddie gasped dramatically. "So… Sensei DID score with Yosuke!" he said, his eyes bulging. Both Yosuke's face and mine were extremely red at this point, and we just stared at our friends.

"It's true…" I said after what felt like a century, wanting to break the murderous silence. "We're dating." Yosuke just looked at me in shock for a moment before I took his hand and squeezed it.

It wasn't how I planned to tell them—if ever we did—and the looks of utter shock on their faces made me nervous. After a couple minutes, Chie spoke up.

"I don't know about everyone else, but _I'm_ perfectly fine with that." She smiled at us happily.

Yosuke and I both sighed with relief, and Kanji smiled too. Teddie looked unsure but he gave us a goofily innocent grin.

"That's fine with me, Sensei! If you have Yosuke, that's more ladies for me!" Yosuke and I both laughed quietly.

Rise looked unsure, but gave us a friendly nod; Naoto looked bored, like she'd seen this in movies a million times before; Yukiko, however, looked to be having trouble believing it.

"Um… Yukiko?" Yosuke said slowly, biting his lip.

"This…" Yukiko began quietly, and she appeared to be thinking for a moment. After a few moments she said, "This is cute!" She smiled. "You two make a really nice couple."

Yosuke looked around at everyone as I looked at him. The silence was incredibly awkward and you could cut the tension with a knife—even with all the smiles.

* * *

It was much later that day and everybody but me and Yosuke had left Junes. We sat quietly across from each other at a small round table, my boyfriend looking a little down.

"I can't believe they found out," he said, still in disbelief. I was, too.

I cleared my throat. "I know…"

"I'm so sorry, Souji. It's all my fault," he began. "If I hadn't taken you up there so we could go make out, this never would've happened."

"It's not your fault," I said gently before making my voice a tad more breathy. "Besides, I like making out with you." I scooted my chair closer to his and brushed my lips onto his smooth, pink ones, gently nibbling at his lower lip. He inhaled sharply and exhaled happily.

"Souji…" he said, looking into my eyes sweetly but suggestively, hinting at what I knew he wanted. I leaned back into my own space and gave him a smile.

"Let's go back to my place," I said, and I stood up. "Nanako and Dojima are visiting relatives and won't be home until tomorrow afternoon." How I was able to remember that I had no idea.

"I like the sound of that," Yosuke purred, running a couple fingers over the chest of my shirt. I sighed quietly and grinned subtly.

"Let's go."

**Poor Yukiko was caught a little off-guard there at first! If **_**I**_** happened upon something like that, I would've been shrieking, too. Except my shriek would be one of utter obsession. Anyway… let me know how you like this! Review! Next chapter will be awesome. I promise. ;)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Here's the updated version~ This chapter is a little short, but next chapter is much longer. You'll probably like this, though!**

As soon as I unlocked my door, Yosuke's back slammed through it and he continued to stumble backwards as I pushed him with my kisses and my body. I shut and locked the door behind me and we clumsily made our way into the living room.

Our lips glided smoothly over each other's and Yosuke began to moan quietly. I could feel his attempts to dominate the kiss and I surrendered; I felt like he was a better kisser than me anyway and it was nice to let him take over for a change. I purred with satisfaction as he stopped kissing me and nibbled at my neck. We were still standing but my legs were shaky and weak, and I managed to choke words out from my haziness.

"We should get to my room…" I breathed, and we tripped and tumbled our way to my room where I clumsily opened the door and shut it behind us.

We both stood there looking into each other's eyes and breathing heavily for a few moments before Yosuke suddenly tackled me onto my bed and we started a messy but passionate kiss that made me moan. Yosuke was moaning now, too. His hand trailed up to my chest as we rolled around on my floor, and he slipped his hand under my shirt and played with my now hardened nipples. In response I began to lick and nip at any part of Yosuke I could reach.

We started to wrestle each other's shirts off and soon we were lying on my floor facing each other, our shirts tossed aside. We were breathing heavily and looking in the other's eyes intently, our bodies just centimeters apart but not touching.

I moved in closer and caught his lips in an innocent kiss that neither of us tried to deepen for a matter of seconds. It was nice.

Then I buried my face in his neck and began sucking on a warm patch of his skin, scooting my body closer to his until we were pressed up against each other and I wrapped my arms around him lovingly—he did the same and I entangled my legs with his.

We both moaned weakly as Yosuke grinded his hips against mine and I began grinding mine too. I moaned in hazy ecstasy and buried my face deeper into the crook of Yosuke's neck as our cocks rubbed together through the fabric of our jeans, creating an unbearable degree of friction. I could feel something coming over us quickly and we started thrusting our hips together and grinding messily.

I could feel my orgasm building and I gave a couple more weak thrusts before our jeans were wet with our release and I was experiencing a climax like no other. We both sighed and panted as we came down from our high. I pulled my face from his neck and looked him in the eye. He looked happy but disappointed at the same time, and I knew why—we didn't go all the way. I ran my fingers through his honey-colored hair and smiled at him. We had all night and the rest of our lives to explore each other.

"I love you, Souji," Yosuke began in a scornful tone, "but next time, I want you inside me."

His words made my heartbeat go crazy. "If you're that insistent, I can't imagine how I could say no."

"Promise?" he asked, giving me a dazzling smile.

"I promise," I said as his smile made me his slave. I would do anything for him.

**Ooh, that was a bit smutty! Delicious. But next chapter is even better. ;) Review and let me know how you liked their little grindfest.~**


	4. Chapter 4

**This chapter is… yeah, it's pretty smutty. It's all shiny and new, too! Completely improved from the old version. :3 I hope you like it!**

Yosuke and I sat around the table in front of the TV in the living room and watched the news. The woman reading the headlines looked to be half asleep as she spoke, and when she was through, she unenthusiastically introduced the weatherman. The weather began uninterestingly and the forecast was supposed to be sunny all week long. I flicked off the TV and looked over at Yosuke, who was staring into the blank TV screen, looking to be somewhat distracted.

"Yosuke?" I said, trying to get his attention.

"Oh…" he said in a tired voice, but his tone became more serious suddenly. "Souji… promise me that… you won't ever fall in love with a girl." It was a bit out of the blue and I jumped a bit at the words. He looked at me with a desperate expression.

"What are you talking about?" I asked slowly, giving him a confused look. After that day at Samegawa River—the day he'd told me he liked me—I'd told him that I was bisexual, not gay. He told me he was gay, but my sexuality had never seemed to be a problem before. Why did it seem to suddenly be an issue?

"I guess it's nothing, but… I just have this weird feeling that one of the girls has her eye on you…" He looked at me and I was surprised. "I figured that if we had sex it would mean we were really in love… and I wouldn't have to worry about losing you to a girl." Yosuke was close to tears, I could tell, and it wasn't like him at all. He was choking on his words and beginning to sniffle. I was worried; I didn't know what to do about crying.

"I love you, Yosuke," I told him. "I don't want to make any promises because I don't want to break them… but if we're being honest, I love you more than I could ever love a girl. Or anybody else, for that matter." I wiped the first tear to flee from his eye and looked into at him seriously to show him I meant it. I scooted around the table and turned Yosuke's head to mine with my hand. He looked at me sadly, tears running down from both eyes.

"Souji, I don't want to lose you," he cried, grabbing me and burying his face in my chest. I kissed the top of his head lovingly.

I put my arm under his back and my other arm under his legs, supporting him, and I stood up slowly. I was pretty strong and Yosuke wasn't heavy at all.

"I think it's time for bed," I said softly, starting the journey up the stairs while carrying my boyfriend bridal style.

When we reached my room, I didn't bother turning on the lights. My window provided just enough moonlight to see each other dimly. I set Yosuke down on my bed and lay down next to him, leaning on my elbow and putting my face over his. I pecked his lips sweetly. Despite the innocence of the kiss, it sparked something inside of me and I suddenly found myself wanted him quite badly.

"I love you, Yosuke," I said, and added in a seductive tone, "I want you." I licked a tear from his cheek.

"Souji! What are you—" he gasped as my tongue ran over his face. I ran my tongue over his lips next, and he opened his mouth quickly. "Kiss me," he commanded as I fondled his quickly hardening cock through the pajama pants I'd lent him. "Please."

That was all I needed to hear. I pressed my open mouth to his waiting lips and our tongues were battling at once. We both were moaning into the kiss, and I was getting extremely hot from Yosuke's noises. I nimbly pulled the elastic over Yosuke's member with one hand and began stroking him gently, prompting a desperate groan from him and I smiled, pulling away from our kiss and continuing to stroke his erection. I stopped for a moment and Yosuke sighed, and I pulled his pants off completely, tossing them onto the floor. By now I was sitting on my knees on my bed next to Yosuke, who was laying down, touching him once again and slipping my other hand underneath the elastic of my own pajama pants to play with my dick. I stopped myself before I went too far and stopped stroking Yosuke as well. He sighed again, and I bent forward and licked the head of Yosuke's manhood.

"Mmm, Souji…" he purred, gripping the blankets underneath him.

I took Yosuke's dick in my mouth and, god, he tasted good. I wanted more. I sucked on him hard and fast, bobbing my head up and down in a rhythm. I slurped up every ounce of precum that came from his dick, enjoying the salty flavor before I took my mouth off Yosuke's manhood slowly. He moaned disappointedly as I stopped. I reached for the lubricant in my desk drawer—when had I acquired this?—and brought it to my lap, squirting some onto my fingers and spreading it carefully over them. I snaked my hand beneath him where his ass laid waiting to be penetrated and I placed my middle finger at his entrance. I poked in gently.

"Tell me if it hurts," I said softly, giving Yosuke words of warning and comfort as I felt him tense up a little from the intrusion.

"I'm okay," he breathed.

"You're so tight," I grumbled, my erection driving me up the wall. I sighed and slipped my finger in further, then added another finger and he inhaled sharply. I stroked him a little to make up for the pain and he sighed.

"Is it bad?" I asked, and he shook his head quickly.

"It's fine," he said firmly, brushing his hand over my cheek. "Just keep going."

"You're being so tough, Yosuke," I told him affectionately.

"It… feels good," he breathed and my heart raced. "I think I'm ready." I had begun a scissoring motion with my fingers when he said that, and I stopped my motions.

"Are you sure?" A nod. "Okay." I pulled my fingers from his entrance and we both sighed. I grabbed the lubricant again and pulled my pants over my erection. I spread the slippery substance over my throbbing member, sighing as the cool oil covered my warmness. "Turn over," I said lightly and he complied, getting on all fours to wait patiently for me.

"Are you ready?" I asked, positioning myself at Yosuke's entrance, the head of my cock touching his delicate hole.

"Yes…" he sighed. "Souji, I'm so happy." He smiled beneath me sincerely.

I smiled back and nodded. "Okay, here I go." I grabbed Yosuke's hips and began to push lightly. I could feel that he was still tight from being so tense.

"Go quickly," he said, his voice breaking a bit and I was worried that I was hurting him. I pushed in a bit faster until I was buried as far as I could go and I remained there for a matter of seconds.

He throbbed around me in pain for a few moments before I felt him relax. "Stay still for a little while…" he groaned.

"Yeah, I will," I told him, my breathing heavy. "I'm sorry if it hurts." I took a deep breath, restraining myself carefully. "I'll be as gentle as I can. I promise."

"Thank you," Yosuke said, a slight laugh in his voice. After a few more seconds he sighed and told me, "You can move now."

"It doesn't hurt too much?" I asked cautiously, trying to avoid hurting him at all costs. I didn't want things to go bad for him the first time and turn him off from sex forever.

"I love having you inside me," he breathed. "Move."

I leaned over his back and kissed his neck appreciatively before I began to thrust gently and slowly. He wasn't as tense as before and it felt _amazing_ to be connected in such a way. I'd pull out a little then push myself back in over and over again. I sped up slowly until one particular thrust made my boyfriend cry out.

"Aah, Souji!" he moaned loudly.

At first I thought I'd done something wrong. "What is it?" I asked nervously.

"That… felt good," he said quietly. "Amazing."

I was ecstatic that I'd done something right and I tried to imitate my previous movement, thrusting carefully but at a decent pace, and Yosuke moaned again. After my experimentation was complete I decided to get serious. I pulled back as far as I could and pumped myself into him quickly, pulled out, and repeated it in a pattern. I was beginning to feel beyond amazing myself, and I began to thrust harder and faster each time. I breathed his name softly.

"S…Souji," he whimpered. "It feels so good! I'm going to come…"

I thrust harder and harder with each passing moment, feeling pent up and on the edge like my boyfriend.

"Souji!" he called out suddenly, and I could feel him tensing up around my dick as I thrust. I could tell he was coming.

"Yosuke…" I breathed loudly as I felt myself begin to fall over the edge. I called his name loudly as I came inside him and he moaned softly as well. It was a feeling different than anything I'd ever felt before—it was almost unreal.

When the extremity of our climaxes was over I pulled out of Yosuke slowly, and he sighed. I pulled my pajama pants back up and Yosuke climbed off the bed to put on the pajamas I'd lent him. I stood up and peeled the top blanket off of the bed and threw it onto the floor; it was covered in both our releases and was sticky. We both laid back down, this time under the blankets, and I wrapped my arms around him from behind.

"I'm never going to let you go," I whispered in his ear gently. "I love you."

"I love you too, Souji. So much."

We fell asleep and I was lost beyond any definition of the word "happy."

**D'aw. Cute. Let me know if you think so, too.~ :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Shiny new chapter five; enjoy!**

I awoke with a start; I could've sworn I'd fallen asleep next to Yosuke, but the image of us together was becoming foggy fast, and I was all by myself in my bed. I got up quickly and checked my room for a note—nothing. I checked all around the floor for Yosuke's "dirty" jeans—gone. The pajama pants I'd lent him… what about those? Come to think of it, I couldn't even remember owning those in the first place and they were nowhere to be found. I began to think I was going crazy. Looking at my bed, I realized all of the blankets were clean and actually _on_ the bed. Didn't I toss those on the floor the night before after Yosuke and I had soiled them? I was too confused. Breathing deeply a few times and trying to calm down, I walked down the stairs and was surprised to find an empty house.

However, I saw a piece of paper sticking to the refrigerator conspicuously and investigated it quickly. It was written out in Dojima's chicken-scratch and said that he and Nanako were visiting relatives.

"What?" I said quietly to myself, thinking they'd already left the day before. I breathed slowly and thought about it in terms of a dream and my situation suddenly made more sense. The vividness of everything still left me questioning, but I shook it off. Everything became clearer when considered a dream. I pulled open the refrigerator carefully and rummaged through lazily, looking for anything close to a potential breakfast. Closing the fridge in dismay, I slumped to the couch and sat down, trying to contemplate my dream.

The first thing I could remember was that Yosuke and I were caught kissing by Yukiko and she told our friends what she saw. Second, we went back to my house and did some explicitly sexual things that didn't include actual sex. Third, Yosuke told me how he thought one of the girls was after me and he cried to me. Lastly, we went to my room and had sex—that was the most realistic part. It was like a movie, in bright color and everything felt so _real_. The thought made me frustrated; everything I thought I was doing in the dream was in vain and ultimately a waste of my thought. Regardless, thinking of the dream gave me a warm feeling, and I suddenly wanted to hold Yosuke in my arms, if even only for a few seconds.

I pulled my phone off of the kitchen counter in front of me—it was close to dying, but disregarding that I dialed Yosuke's cell phone number and put the phone up to my ear.

"Souji?" The voice on the other end of the phone was undoubtedly that of my boyfriend and I sighed; his gentle resonance always seemed to put my mind at ease, and this was no exception.

"Hey," I said with a smile in my voice. "Do you want to come over today?

"Well, my dad asked me to come in today, but I could probably get out of it. Why, though? You were just over yesterday."

"I just wanted to see you," I said softly. It felt strange to say that aloud; normally Yosuke was the one to say those sorts of things.

Yosuke paused. "Oh? I'll tell my dad I can't work, then," he said with a quiet laugh. "I'll be there in a few."

"Are you walking?" I asked.

"Yeah, why?" he replied.

"I'll meet you. The park."

He paused again and I could almost hear the grin on his face. "Sure," he said. "See you soon." I echoed him and we hung up.

I slipped on my shoes before I left, venturing out into the sun and walking fast in the morning heat. It took me longer than I would've liked for me to reach the park—I lived farther from it than Yosuke did—but when I arrived there my boyfriend hadn't even arrived yet. I pulled out my still-dying phone and called him again.

"What do you want?" he joked, and I laughed.

"Where are you at?" I asked. "I'm already here."

"Really? I'm walking right now. I was running a little late, sorry."

"Don't worry about it," I said. "I'll see you in a bit. Later." And we hung up.

I closed my phone and sat on a wooden bench next to an assortment of cherry blossom trees, now coming out of season with the summertime. The breeze was very refreshing as it blew over me gently, and before I knew it I'd dozed off. I slept lightly for awhile and when I woke up, the once bright sky had become infested with clouds. The sun was gone and it was cool out, feeling misty. I pulled my dying phone from my pocket, feeling a little panicked that I'd slept, and the time read 11:02AM. I was able to speculate that it was a little past ten-thirty when I'd called Yosuke—what had happened? Why hadn't Yosuke shown up and woke me up? I dialed Yosuke's number in my phone quickly and pressed the little green button, then waited. No answer. I tried again, and again there was no answer.

I stood up from the bench I was on and stretched, feeling very wary of my surroundings. There was nobody around, and I didn't feel like walking home in the suddenly bad weather, but I had no choice. I started walking toward my house when my cell phone rang from my pocket and I jumped a bit.

"Yosuke?" I answered frantically into the phone.

"Yosuke? Man, it's Kanji!" It was none other than Kanji Tatsumi, the only one who knew about Yosuke and I. And he seemed to be in a panic, which worried me.

"Oh, Kanji," I said, thinking perhaps he could provide an explanation for my confusing situation.

"Don't 'oh, Kanji' me!" he said frantically, his voice angry. "Haven't you heard?"

My heart picked up speed. "Heard about what? No…"

"About Yosuke!" he said. "He…" Kanji's voice softened and he sounded very vulnerable. "He was shot!"

I paused, frozen where I stood. A smile slowly crept over my cold lips and I laughed hollowly. "That really isn't funny, Kanji," I told him, my voice dark.

"I ain't fuckin' around!" Kanji said in a teary voice.

"No, no," I said quietly. "I know you are."

"Souji, listen to me! Your fuckin' _boyfriend_ just got shot in the head! I'd be a _little_ more concerned if I was you, man!" Kanji was shouting into the phone, beginning to hurt my ear.

I didn't know what to say. I knew he was serious even if I didn't want to believe him; when Kanji started crying, something was seriously wrong.

"I… I don't… Is he okay?" I was speaking slowly and _still_ stuttering. I tripped over my words and felt ready to collapse on the ground.

"Let's meet at the bus stop in the shopping district, okay? We'll catch a bus to the hospital."

"Sure… sure," I said weakly, forgetting that I'd even asked him a question and not even wondering how I would be getting to the bus stop. My knees were weak, feeling as if they could no longer hold my body weight, but they carried me as quickly as they could to where I knew I was meeting my friend.

"I'll be there soon," he reassured me. "Try not to worry." Even with Kanji's comforts, I felt like I couldn't breathe.

I hung up the phone slowly. Kanji was acting tough, but he was broken up on the inside… or maybe that was me. After a block or two, my legs were starting to become stronger and I managed a decent pace until I reached the bus stop, stopping when I approached the small pole with a picture of a bus on it, and looked toward town to see if I could see Kanji.

There he was, walking quickly toward me, rubbing his right eye. When he was close enough to see him better, I noticed his eyes were red, and a bit puffy. He must've been crying.

"Souji!" He shouted, running to me when he saw I'd beaten him there. When he was next to me, neither of us said anything. There wasn't much of anything either of us could think to say.

Suddenly, we heard the roar of a huge engine coming our way, so we turned and looked, the bus coming at us quickly but slowing down. It came to a stop and the door opened with a snap. Kanji and I stepped into the vehicle, and I pulled a hundred yen from my pocket. Slipping it in the box at the front carefully, Kanji and I walked toward the back of the bus and took seats next to each other. Finally able to let my body rest, I put my elbows on my knees and buried my face in my hands. I cleared my throat and tried not to choke on the tears I could feel coming.

"I'm sorry, Souji…" Kanji said softly, rubbing my back, but I didn't know what I could do to stop myself from crying.

I breathed deeply and slowly removed my face from my hands, sitting up slowly and staring out of the bus window for a good half hour before we reached the hospital. It was the longest thirty minutes of my life. Snapping back into reality, after being so deep in my own mind for so long, necessitated Kanji literally shaking me back and forth.

"We're here," he said as he rustled me, his hand on my shoulder, and my eyes regained their exhausted life.

"Sure…" I said quietly, getting up and following Kanji off the now-crowded bus, my mind slowly running through exactly how I'd gotten where I was. When had all those people gotten on? I walked blankly toward Kanji, but didn't seem to reach him until he stopped in front of a door and I promptly ran into him. He turned around in surprise and gave me a questioning look.

"Sorry," I said in a voice that was barely audible, not sure I still remembered how to use my words. The door opened at a pace which seemed to take forever and we stepped in, and suddenly there were people rushing everywhere—it was a generally uninviting environment, regardless of how hospitals are supposed to be. Everything smelled like medicine and antibacterial spray, and there were worried-looking people everywhere you turned your head. We approached the front desk where a woman wearing a nurse hat looked at us with a crooked smile.

"How may I help you boys?" she asked slowly, her voice helpful, even if her face was a little off.

"Is Hanamura Yosuke here?" Kanji asked, his voice short. No matter how compassionate I knew he could be, when we were in an urgent situation, Kanji would get feisty fast.

"Hanamura? You mean the Prince of Junes? He came in just an hour ago. He might not be allowed any visitors yet, but I can check if you'd like…"

"We don't care about that! Just tell us where he is!" Kanji said a little louder. The nurse looked stern, but gave us Yosuke's room number after some coaxing, and Kanij and I began our trek to the twelfth floor to where we learned Yosuke had just been operated on.

**I hope you keep reading after this! Don't hate me! Also don't forget to review!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Pretty, sparkly chapter six. Enjoy!**

Kanji and I rushed our way through the hospital rooms, pushing nurses and shoving doctors when we had to to reach our target. Upon finally reaching the room the nurse had told us Yosuke was in, we barged through the door where a few doctors and many nurses were huddled in the corner of the room. I could hear Yosuke's heart rate monitor go faster and faster with each moment as we began making our way to the bed slowly. We stepped around a young, frantic-looking nurse, and we were immediately horrified by the unbelievable image in front of us. Right there in plain sight was Yosuke Hanamura, the one I loved, blood dried on his face, his eyes only half-open. His whole head was bandaged and drenched in a sick crimson, and I cringed, freezing where I stood.

"Yo…suke…" I whispered slowly, brokenly, beholding the harrowing sight before me. I was shaking all over, my hands unable to stay still at my sides.

Kanji hesitated, breaking himself away from the view on the bed and looking at the huddled hospital staff.

"Why ain't you doctors doin' anything?" Kanji nearly yelled at them, and they all turned their heads to look at him in unison. The doctors gave him questioning looks and the nurses looked scared. "Why're you just staring?" Kanji demanded. "You got a patient layin' on the bed here, and he's lookin' pretty damn serious!"

One of the doctors finally spoke up, his deep voice amplifying in the spacey room, which was occupied with only the sounds of breathing and the various machines to which Yosuke was hooked up. "We have just finished evasive surgery to remove the bullet from this young man's head." He paused. "Are you friends of Mr. Hanamura?"

"Yeah," Kanji said, taking a deep breath. He was beginning to calm down, but I couldn't focus my attention toward the doctors. Suddenly, it seemed, I couldn't move my eyes from my boyfriend on the bed.

I slowly moved my hand toward Yosuke's, and grabbed it lightly, using my short fingernail to gently scrape some dried blood off his skin.

"Why isn't he awake?" I asked, and one of the doctors walked over to the bed and began to explain.

"The surgery was just finished. He had to be put out for it, of course, and the anesthetic is still in effect." He looked at me for a moment, eyeing me carefully.

"Oh," I said simply. I enclosed Yosuke's hand in mine, squeezing it lightly. His hand was warm, and mine cold and clammy. Just looking at him laying there made it hard to hold back tears, but I did my best for the situation and didn't start crying.

A few moments later I saw Yosuke's eyes begin to flutter open and he lay there looking at me, appearing to be in a bit ofpain . My hand twitched a little when I felt Yosuke try to squeeze my hand back.

"S…Souji?" Yosuke whispered in question, and I nodded, noticing it to be harder to restrain tears, though I still let none escape.

"I'm here, Yosuke," I said quietly as the doctors realized that Yosuke was awake and promptly began running about the room, checking all sorts of strange-looking machines.

"What… happened?" he asked simply. Even talking, it seemed, was using up a good portion of his energy. "My head hurts…"

"You got shot…" I said, my voice fading out at the end as I tried not to choke on my words; that was so hard to say. Yosuke's face lit up a little with the news, though.

"Oh… That… that makes sense…" Even behind the pain and exhaustion, I could still see the Yosuke I knew, and it made me smile a little.

"Mr. Hanamura, you shouldn't be talking," one of the doctors said, his voice taking on a suggesting tone. "You'll strain yourself."

He rolled his eyes as best he could and looked toward me, whispering quietly to me, "Kiss me?" I looked around, seeing a few pairs of eyes on us, but none of them seemed to have heard what he said. I turned my eyes back to him, trying to decide what to do.

Then one of the scared nurses began pulling the hospital curtain around the bed, enclosing me next to Yosuke, and I felt the fabric of the curtain touching my back lightly, making me shudder a little. It was only Yosuke and I inside the curtain, and in our privacy, I leaned over him and pressed our lips together. It felt strange, with the cords and wires everywhere, and I couldn't entangle my hand in his hair like I usually would. Instead, I just kissed him gently for as long as I could, and pulled away quickly but gently as I heard rustling in the curtains. Yosuke's eyes were full of tired affection, and I returned his gaze.

"Say goodbye, Mr. Hanamura. Your visitor has got to go," a young nurse said as she stepped into the curtain and addressed Yosuke sweetly. I stifled a chuckle, thinking how try as that nurse might, she wouldn't get any sort of interested response from this patient.

"Goodbye, Souji…" Yosuke whispered quietly, adding in a barely audible voice, "I love you."

"I love you too, Yosuke," I replied in the same vocal dynamic, smiling at him lovingly. "Goodbye." I didn't want to leave, but I knew I had to. Kanji poked his head into the tan curtain and smiled at Yosuke.

"Bye," he said. "Hope you feel better." He disappeared behind the curtain once again, and I let go of Yosuke's hand. I smiled sadly and disappeared behind the curtain too, joining Kanji near the exit and not bothering to give the busy medical staff any sort of goodbye.

Kanji and I walked out at a slow but firm pace, talking about what the doctors had said about Yosuke. The doctors had told him that they weren't worried about Yosuke pulling through—he'd already survived the hardest part of it all—but he wouldn't be able to leave the hospital for quite some time. I listened carefully to everything Kanji said, both relieved and disappointed at what he'd found out.

"I see," I said quietly after he'd finished. "I guess there's nothing we can do but hope for a quick recovery…" Tears were beginning to swell in my eyes, and Kanji could see it. Exiting the hospital doors, we walked to the bus stop, and there I completely lost it. Tears flooded and gushed from my eyes, though I didn't exactly feel like I was crying. Kanji suddenly embraced me, squeezing me tight around the waist and I put my arms around my friend to squeeze back, burying my face in his shoulder.

**Thank goodness he's okay! How are you feeling right about now? Review and let me know!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Derp next revamped chapter herewego. PLEASE NOTE that this is NOT Souji's POV. He took a break.**

The next few weeks went very smoothly, Yosuke's vital signs getting good enough to get him out of intensive care and into a regular hospital room, which he shared with a younger boy who he learned had just woken up from a coma and was recovering from a boating accident. During the early morning and evening they both had testing to be done and medicine to be administered, but when they had downtime in between, they'd always talk about school and what they'd need to catch up on when they got back.

"I have the greatest friends at my high school. I miss them so much," Yosuke'd said nostalgically one day, thinking of Souji, who had been too busy to visit lately, as he and the rest of his class studied for college entrance exams.

"I don't have many friends at my middle school…" the boy, whose name was Hideo Nojiri, said somewhat sadly. His voice was a bit strained, muffled by bandages here and there and stiff from the screws in his jaw that he hadn't gotten used to yet.

"Really?" Yosuke said, adjusting a bit in his bed.

"Well, there is _one_ person who I always talk to…" he began quietly. "She's really special to me. She's the first person I want to see when I get out of here."

"Oh," Yosuke said quietly, surprised, but at the same time, not surprised at all. For reasons that were obvious only to himself and a few others, he wasn't very good at talking about girls. However, he wasn't _too_ inexperienced in the way of crushes. "Do… do you like her?"

Hideo hesitated. "I think so… I got a letter from her. My mom read it to me a couple days after I woke up… It was really nice of her. And she sent this cute little drawing with it, signed by a couple of people I know. She's a really good artist."

Yosuke chuckled to himself, thinking about when he was that age. He'd liked a girl then too, but didn't remember much of anything about it. "That's cool of her. I'm sure she's a great girl."

"Yeah."

"Is she pretty?" Yosuke asked. He couldn't help it. "What does she look like?"

"She's got curly brown hair and glasses, and she's kinda short," Hideo answered, thinking back on when he'd last seen her. It was sometime back in school, when she'd walked into her last class, which was next to his locker.

"Sounds hot," Yosuke said, making it up as he went. Hideo just blushed, and their conversation ended as nurses came in to do a blood test on Yosuke. _Saved by the nurses,_he thought in relief, knowing the conversation would only get awkward from there.

Later that day, as Yosuke laid calmly in his bed, there was a knock on the door and a nurse came in bearing an envelope.

"Mr. Hanamura, you've gotten a letter from Mr. Seta." From all of Souji's visits, the hospital staff was nearly on a first-name basis with him. The nurse walked over to the bed. "Would you like me to read it to you?" she asked flirtatiously.

Fearing what Souji might've written, Yosuke turned down the nurse's offer, taking the envelope from her politely.

"If you're sure, Mr. Hanamura," the nurse said disappointedly before looking at the other bed in the room, currently empty. "Is Mr. Nojiri out for testing?"

"Yeah," Yosuke replied, tearing open the envelope and removing a couple pieces of paper. The nurse left with no parting words and the door shut with a gentle _click_ before Yosuke began reading Souji's letter.

_Dear Yosuke,_

_You probably know finals are coming up, and college entrance exams as well. I want so badly to come visit you, but Dojima insists that I spend all my free time studying to get into the best colleges… On that note, most of those aren't in Inaba. I'm aiming for Yasogami University, but Dojima thinks I'm too good for that…_

_Anyway, I miss you so much. It's hard being away from you so much… You must be in so much pain right now. I wish I could be there right next to you, kiss you all I want, and take away your pain…_

_I love you more than I can put on paper. I hope you know that. I'm going to try and sneak in to see you sometime soon, probably after school one of these days. So keep your schedule open and tell all those nurses you've got plans. ;)_

_I'm writing this from the table downstairs, and Nanako's been begging me to read it to her. I'm not going to, so she settled for me letting her write you a letter too. It's on the next page._

_Oh, by the way, Ms. Kashiwagi told me to tell you "Get well soon," and to warn you of the impending exams you'll have to take when you're well enough._

_I promise I'll visit you soon, Yosuke. I love you so much, and I miss you like crazy. I'll be there sometime this week, and maybe we can have some alone time. You don't know how badly I've been wanting you lately… maybe it's because I can't have you right now. Not to sound like a creep, but you're going to be mine as soon as you get out of the hospital._

_I've said it __so__ many times already, but it's true. I love you Yosuke, and I'll see you soon._

_Love,  
Souji_

Souji's firm words at the end made Yosuke blush, and he felt blood rush to his groin as he thought of exactly what Souji'd meant by being "his." The thought made him hard before he was even aware of it, but he wasn't sure what he should do. What if he got caught? In his state, would he even have the strength to do something like that?

He used what strength he had to sit up in his bed, stand up on the floor—though a little wobbly—and stumble to the bathroom. He went inside, turned on the bathroom light, and locked the door behind him. He sat tiredly on the toilet seat and pulled the elastic of his hospital pants over his erection.

_It's been awhile,_ Yosuke thought as he fondled himself carefully, enjoying the pleasure it gave him thoroughly. He then turned on the faucet in the sink next to him and wet his hand with warm water, bringing it to his swollen member and soaking it. Turning off the faucet, he grabbed the bottle of hand soap sitting by it and squirted some in his hand before lathering his erection with his makeshift lubricant. He began stroking himself slowly, but realized that pace was going to drive him crazy.

"Mmm…" he moaned softly, trying to keep his mouth closed to muffle his noises as he imagined Souji's hand on him instead of his own. The suds were making a bit of a mess, he noticed, so with his free hand, he grabbed some toilet paper and wiped up some excess soap bubbles.

He began pumping faster with each moment, his climax approaching fast from not having an orgasm for so long. "Uhnn… nngh…" Yosuke groaned in pleasure, running his hand quicker and quicker up and down his shaft, and soon he was almost climaxing.

"Nnngh, Souji!" he called out in the little bathroom, moaning and groaning and panting as a stream of his release shot a few inches in front of him and splattered on the bathroom floor.

Coming down from his high, Yosuke grabbed some toilet paper and cleaned the suds from his now flaccid member, and hid it back underneath his hospital pants. He leaned forward a little and wiped his release from the floor, still panting from the orgasm, and discarded the tissue. He stood up and washed his hands until they were completely clean, and made his wobbly way toward his hospital bed, then laid down, grabbing the letter and shoving it back into the envelope. He placed the envelope under his pillow, hoping no one would find it.

A little later—once he was a bit calmer—he read Nanako's letter, which was pretty much just a "get well soon," and talking about going to Junes when Yosuke was "all better." She ended the letter with the Junes theme song, signed her name messily, and Yosuke put the letter down smiling. He'd tired himself out from his escapades in the bathroom, and he just wanted to rest. So he closed his eyes serenely with every intention of not falling asleep, but regardless of that he slowly slipped into sleep with Souji on his mind.

**Chapter seven, all done! Things are looking up! Review—how're you liking it?**


	8. Chapter 8

**Here's the brand new chapter eight!**

There was bright, hot light pouring through my bedroom window as I awoke, and my bed was wonderfully warm and cozy. I curled up underneath my sheets and sighed, then yawned and began slowly to squirm out of my bed. I felt myself half-consciously sit up and stretch. When my eyes fluttered open lazily, everything came to life. My desk, my work table, my couch, the TV… it all flooded into my vision and I breathed a warm breath. Waking up had been a harsh reality lately. All I wanted was to be able to go see Yosuke at his house, snuggle with him the whole day, and reluctantly part ways come night. Let the pattern repeat, and remain happy.

That was, however, far from what really could happen. For one, Yosuke was still in the hospital. That alone was enough to kill me. He wouldn't be out for a few more weeks. I also had college entrance exams coming soon for which I had to study relentlessly. Studying had become my main focus lately, so I hadn't visited Yosuke in a few weeks. That was the plan for today, Sunday. I'd sent him a letter earlier last week… hopefully no one else had read it. Though there was nothing too explicit written, it would still be pretty informative if someone were to read it and know it was from a guy.

I had a spring in my step as I got ready that morning, though. I was so excited to see Yosuke that I could hardly breathe. Inhaling the meager breakfast I'd prepared, the toast gone in a heartbeat, the apple down to the core, and what was a glass of milk three seconds ago was an empty glass in the sink, I was almost ready to go and feeling great.

"Nanako, I'm leaving now," I said, grabbing my jacket from the coat rack and slipping it on. "I'll call you before I go into the hospital and when I come out, okay?"

Nanako smiled. "'Kay, big bro," she sang. "Tell Yosuke I say hi, okay? And to get better!"

I smiled back at her genuinely. "I promise I'll tell him," I said, kneeling down to look her straight in the eye. "Bye, Nanako." I stood up and opened the door as she returned the goodbye, walking out and closing the door gently behind me.

I made the trek to the bus stop near the shopping district, and waited impatiently for the bus to arrive. Once it did, I boarded and waited for awhile before the bus finally made the stop at the hospital. I paid my fare and got off the bus quickly, thinking about how I'd never liked riding the bus; it took too long and the people riding were almost always unpleasant—sometimes violent, smelly, or perverted.

After a trek across the bottom floor of the hospital, I rode the elevator up to the fifth floor, where Yosuke was staying, and eventually made it to his room. I cleared my throat and knocked on the door of the room slowly, and I heard a quiet, "Come in," before I opened the door gingerly.

There was Yosuke, lying in his bed with a bright smile on his face as he saw it was me who entered the room.

"Hey, Yosuke," I said as I walked further toward my hospitalized boyfriend, shutting the door behind me. I looked around, and raised my eyebrows at him. "No doctors? Really?"

"Hi," he said with a laugh. "And nope, I've got probably another hour or so before they come back." He looked like he was still in pain; but then again, he looked a whole lot better than he did a couple months back.

I continued over toward his bed, and I noticed him scoot into more of a sitting-up sort of position. "How are you feeling?" I asked, grabbing his hand gently, squatting down and laying my chin next to him on his bed. I could feel him squeeze my hand weakly.

"I'm fine," he said firmly, but his voice sounded so small to me at that moment. "I don't want you to worry about me." He smiled softly, but I could see the pain behind the mask.

It was silent between us for a few moments, and I savored the way he was looking at me so affectionately. I don't know what I would've done if I'd lost him. Then, we heard a door open and a couple of voices, and I raised my head to look. Doctors? It hadn't been more than five minutes I'd been there.

"Mr. Hanamura, there's a physical therapist here to see you," said one of the men in a medical coat that had walked in. Yosuke looked confusedly at the man.

"I thought there wasn't going to be any therapy until later…?" he inquired. I could feel my expression drop; I was really looking forward to visiting with Yosuke, considering this was the first I'd seen of him for several weeks.

The doctor folded his arms over the front of his long, white medical coat. "She finished up her last appointment early," he said, his voice reverberating with a slight hint of impatience. "She doesn't have all day, so you need to get over to the therapy room as soon as possible."

Yosuke sighed and frowned at the doctor, mimicking the man's impatient presence. "Well, this is the first time my boyfriend's been able to visit me in weeks," he said, his voice sounding a little weaker than he looked, but his tone was still firm. I wondered why he'd specifically referred to me as a boyfriend in front of the doctor, Yosuke never the type to shout to the world that we were dating.

The doctor gave us both a look of slight confusion at first, but it quickly faded back to the previous degree of unpleasantness, if not more intense.

"Mr. Hanamura," came a lighter, higher-pitched voice from behind the doctor. "Would you like to bring him along with you?" The question was asked by a young-looking woman in green and blue scrubs. She stepped out from behind the doctor, and the doctor looked at her, shaking his head. Yosuke looked at the woman questioningly.

"My name is Toriko Ishikawa," she said with a friendly smile. "I'm your new physical therapist." I looked at the woman for a long time. She was very pretty, with long, curly, light brown hair that reached her waist. She was wearing a head band to keep her hair from her face, and she was holding a clipboard, glancing at it occasionally.

"Oh," my boyfriend said simply, his voice sounding even weaker than before. "Would it really be okay if Souji came along?" He sounded hopeful… _He must've really missed me,_I thought, feeling fluttery all of a sudden. It seemed he'd been thinking of me just as much as I'd been thinking of him.

"Yep," said the therapist with a cheery smile. She even _sounded_ young and peppy, and I guessed that couldn't have been older than her mid-twenties.

"Wow. Thank you," he said as the woman came over to the bed, and I stood up to shake her hand.

"I'm Souji Seta," I said politely, but a smile was void from my face. I was a little nervous; I'd never seen anybody do physical therapy before, and I didn't know really what it consisted of.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Seta," she said with a smile. "I'm sure I'll be seeing you around, as I plan to be around Mr. Hanamura quite a bit for the next couple of months."

I nodded and let go of her small hand, and she smiled at Yosuke before taking him by the arm gently and looking at him in a friendly way. "Can you sit up for me, Mr. Hanamura?"

Yosuke sighed and sat up, not taking any of the help offered by the therapist. "I got shot in the head, I'm not stupid," he said in a teasing voice. I saw my Yosuke in there and grinned as he moved his legs so he was sitting on the edge of the bed, and I could see that the therapist was still touching his arm. She smiled at me politely.

I walked around to Yosuke's side of the bed and took his hand to help him stand up.

"You're walking to the therapy room today, Mr. Hanamura," Toriko said, taking her hand off of Yosuke's arm when I helped him up. Yosuke nodded. "How's your balance?" the therapist asked further, taking a few steps back and beckoning for Yosuke to walk toward her.

I let go of Yosuke's hand and he stumbled slowly over to her, stopping right before he reached her. "It's okay," he said with a slow breath, and I walked over to him and grabbed his hand. I felt him relax a little and I smiled to myself.

After some scribbling on her clipboard, Toriko smiled up at Yosuke and began walking out of the room. "Okay, let's go, then!" she said, beaming at us. Apparently the doctor had already left. He didn't seem to be in the best of moods that day anyway.

Off we went, then, toward the physical therapy room, which was on the fourth floor. I held Yosuke's hand and walked slowly with him to the elevator. We followed Toriko close behind until we reached said elevator, and once it was at our level, we stepped inside and the door came to a close behind us. There was nothing I wanted to do more at that moment than kiss Yosuke until he was weak, but with the physical therapist right there in the elevator as it started going down, it would be hard, a little awkward, and she'd probably ask us to stop.

Yosuke, with his free hand, was clutching to the bar on the elevator wall for dear life, leaning against it slightly as the elevator made its movement down. At one particular moment, right before the elevator stopped, Toriko began to flip through the pages on her clipboard, apparently quite consumed in what she was reading.

I smiled slyly.

Taking advantage of the opportunity, I leaned in and pressed my lips to Yosuke's quickly, only staying together for around three seconds before pulling away, and just in time. The elevator made a small _ding_ noise, and Toriko turned around and looked at us with a smile before walking off the elevator.

I looked over at Yosuke silently, a satisfied smile gracing my lips now. He had a soft, dreamy smile. I could tell he'd wanted to kiss me as well.

I began walking, then, making my way off the elevator and leading Yosuke slowly behind me. I let go of him as he took a step to get off the elevator, but immediately regretted doing so; a doctor came charging through at full speed, right past me and ran into Yosuke as he was stepping out of the elevator.

The doctor was obviously in a hurry, but it's a doctor's job to _help_ patients, right?

Nonetheless, Yosuke then was hurled into the wall, his head hitting the unforgiving surface with a sick _thud_. He then fell to the ground, his slender body limp, and everything seemed to be in slow motion. I kneeled down immediately, calling out to him desperately. I knew this was more than bumping his head—I could tell. His eyes were closed, and he looked unconscious.

"Yosuke! Y-Yosuke!" I called out as I blurrily saw doctors and nurses appear slowly around him. One man, a doctor no doubt, gently but forcefully pulled me up and moved me, taking my spot, and that's the last thing I saw before my boyfriend was carried away on a stretcher, unconscious and unresponsive.

**Holy jesus, what's going on. Review.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Depressing stuff ahead. I hope you love it!**

Needless to say, things weren't the best after that incident. It didn't take long for the doctors to emerge from the hospital room to which they'd rushed Yosuke and announce to me and the friends that had arrived that our friend had slipped into a coma from the impact of hitting his head.

It seemed like a perfect time to crawl into a corner and die. That's all I wanted to do. At first I was in some kind of a shock, but it didn't take long for me to explode, and even worse than when he'd first been shot.

At first, when Yosuke was shot, I felt like I was going to lose him. I felt like he was going to die. I definitely didn't know what I was going to do if that had happened, but I had an idea. My head wasn't functioning well at the time, but I knew my thoughts were all telling me that if Yosuke died, then I would've found some way to die with him. Thinking of that now made me feel sick to my stomach. But a coma was completely different. I couldn't join Yosuke in a comatose state and be with him as was the case in death. I felt trapped in a separate world from him, and I didn't think anybody else could understand what I was going through.

During this moment of absolute turmoil, the rest of the group had showed up. Kanji was the first to arrive, then Yukiko and Teddie, then Chie, then Naoto and Rise. They all were wondering why my head was buried in Kanji's shoulder and why I was crying like a girl—that much I was aware of.

Kanji asked my permission to tell them about me and Yosuke, and I just nodded, listening with remorse as he explained.

I didn't need to look up to see the shock in everyone's faces. Everybody but Teddie was silent, but I could still hear the surprise in the air coming from everywhere. I couldn't see anybody in Kanji's shoulder, and even if I had lifted my head all I would've seen was a tearfully blurry scene of all of my friends staring at me.

Eventually everything quieted down, though, and a doctor called Kanji aside to talk to him. I didn't want to look up at everyone, but I lifted my head and looked around for a moment before curling into a ball on the bench where I was sitting. I laid my arms over my knees and rested my head face down. The little cave I'd created was dark and ultimately refreshing. I suddenly felt a hand rubbing gently at my upper back and I turned my head to where the hand appeared to be coming from. It was Chie, who appeared to be very broken up, but trying to comfort me.

"A-are you okay, Souji?" she asked, her voice faltering a little, and I tried to even myself out before speaking. I took in a deep breath before I responded.

"No," I said. My voice had almost cracked but I was able to keep the once word monotone. I used my sleeve to wipe the tears from my face. Apparently my tear ducts had dried up for the moment, but I still felt several huge sobs building up in my chest. I did my best to hold them back; I was supposed to be their fearless leader.

Chie didn't say anything, and I was a little grateful for it. If she had responded I would've had to say something else and then she again, and it would've dragged on.

I took a deep, shaky breath and let it out, partially sobbing, and I began to choke. I bit my lip as I let my head fall into my arms and my eyes became just as drowned in tears as they were before. I felt Chie begin rubbing my back again, and I could tell she didn't know how to handle this situation any more than I did. It was almost a comforting feeling.

It wasn't long after that when a couple of nurses came out and began telling everyone that visiting hours nearly over and that they should go home soon. One by one and two by two everybody left, even Kanji eventually leaving my side—but I was determined to stay.

It appeared that I had been dozing off, and an almost violent whispering of, "Sir!" was enough to wake me.

It came again. "Sir!" the voice hissed. "It's getting too late. You need to go home." My eyes popped open and I tried to regain my vision. It was still light in the hospital lobby, but there was almost no one around now. The only people in the room were me, the nurse who was trying to usher me out, and the receptionist, who appeared to be napping.

Without saying a word, I rose from my place on the bench and started toward the door. Just to the left was the elevator, which could take me to Yosuke's floor if I told it to. It was the most tempting thought I'd ever had, but it wouldn't do me any good to see him then.

Out the door I fled, then, my largo quickly accelerating to an agitato as I found that it was raining outside. The walk from the hospital to my house was one that I didn't care to walk, but I didn't have the spirit to deal with a bus, so my legs would just have to find the strength to take me themselves.

The rain began to pour. It felt like whatever god there was in the sky was unleashing his watery wrath on me for whatever reason, perhaps just spilling buckets of water all over me to try and slow me down. What had I done wrong? Was there something I was being punished for?

I reached home and immediately slumped into bed. I changed first, of course, but couldn't even find the strength to take a shower.

When I'd found that I couldn't sleep, I rose from my bed and took a seat at my work desk. I pulled out a school notebook and opened to a page that wasn't packed with notes or homework and grabbed a pencil. I didn't even have to think about my words as I wrote them down; they just seemed to fly from my hand without any of my own accord.

_I don't know what I did wrong. Is there any way I can fix this? I would give my life to be with Yosuke right now, but not even sacrificing my own life will help me this time. It's not enough to stand next to him or to lie and hold him. If he can't smile at me and laugh with me, can't return my grasp at his hands and can't return the kisses I plant on his lips, it's not worth being near him at all. I don't know what I want. For him to awaken from his coma and to be living again, like a regular person, would be more than ideal. We would be lovers and friends and everything in between and I wouldn't have to leave everybody else that I love. But if we could die together, neither of us could be hurt any longer. There's no guarantee of what happens after death, though, is there? There are all religions' beliefs and the teachings of the bible, and then there are the atheists that think we just rot in the ground when we die. But there's no promise; no set-in-stone rights that I would even see Yosuke on the other side. If that was the case I could walk right into Yosuke's room right now and pull him away from all those machines. I'd take any medication I could find lying around and we'd both die in each others' arms. (I'm not afraid to die. I'm especially not afraid to die with Yosuke. No, it's not death I'm afraid of; it's the afterlife.) I wish I could see him and love him… I want to have Yosuke in every way possible. To have and to hold him—to kiss and make love to him. No matter the diction I use to express it, the only thing that I want is Yosuke._

**Oh… sad… Review?**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter ten! Hope you're excited. All shiny and new.**

The next day set the example for what the next few months were going to be for me. Waking up and attending school, coming home and working, then taking a shower and sleeping. It wasn't until the end of fall that someone attempted to get me out of the funk I'd seemed to get myself into.

It was on a particularly bright Sunday that I sat at my table, my head cradled by my hand, staring into the sun. I looked over at the wall to reveal a rather dark spot in my eyes. I heard the doorbell a few seconds later and I blinked, not expecting anybody. Dojima and Nanako were at the park and I was relaxing that day, or as close to relaxation that I could get.

I rose slowly from the table, not in any hurry to answer the door. I hadn't felt lately that I was in any condition to communicate with people. Maybe I'd get lucky and it was a package being delivered.

No such luck. I opened the door to find Yukiko, looking quite nervous, on my doorstep. She gave me a bashful look before saying softly, "Can I come in?"

I realized that, although it was sunny outside, it was rather chilly, and I gestured for her to come in. "Is something wrong?" I asked once she was inside and the door was closed.

Yukiko began loosening her scarf from her neck and sliding it off. "No," she said. "I was just in the neighborhood and decided to stop in and see how you were. I never see you anymore."

"Oh." I didn't feel like I needed her there, and I was almost tempted to ask her to leave. I wasn't in the mood for company.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she said after a few moments of silence, blushing, and a look of terror on her face. "I'm being rude. Did I come at a bad time?"

I suddenly felt bad for thinking that I wanted her to leave. It couldn't hurt for me to sit around and have some idle conversation for a little while. Yukiko was a good person to talk to, anyway. She always had something to talk about but she knew when to be quiet.

"No, not at all!" I said quickly, trying my best to plaster a smile on my face. It was almost painful to smile. It seemed like after that day I just… couldn't. "I'm sorry, too; I was a little zoned out. I'll make some coffee."

So Yukiko took a seat at the table and I started the pot of coffee. When it was brewing I took a seat in the chair next to her.

"Souji?" She spoke my name softly and I could tell she was going to tell me something serious. She always used that tone when something was wrong back in the previous year, when we were all journeying into the TV together.

"Huh?" I responded, keeping my response simple. I didn't want to ask if something was wrong again.

"I was really surprised when I heard that you and Yosuke were… together…" she said, her voice almost at a whisper, even quieter when she spoke Yosuke's name, and she put a lot of stress on the word 'together'.

I just cocked my head at her a little. Where was she going with this?

"But I… I don't think I can accept that you're _gay_."

My head began to spin. I didn't understand what she meant or why she was telling me this. When she said the word gay, she spoke of it bitterly, like it was the plague. It didn't bother me as much as I'm sure it should've.

"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to clarify.

"I-I…" she stuttered, suddenly looking up at me. Her face was horribly red, and I could almost hear what she said next before she said it. "I… I like you, Souji."

In the moment I happened to be looking into her eyes, I felt a moment of weakness. I felt that Yukiko was _such_ a good person and I didn't want to make her feel bad. After a few moments of silence I looked back down, still thinking.

"Don't worry."

I looked back up and saw the side of Yukiko's head. She had her finger near the bottom of her right eye, and it almost looked as if she were wiping away a tear. "I won't give up, but I don't expect anything. I already know you're in love with Yosuke…"

"You're right," I said simply, but I elaborated. "I am in love with Yosuke. But…" and she looked up. I knew what she was expecting and I knew it was far from what she wanted to actually happen. "I-I can… go out with you for… a while, if you want…"

Yukiko's eyes widened and she gave me a confused look for a moment. "Souji!" she said softly, a smile growing on her face plainly. The smile she was able to maintain gave me satisfaction. I didn't realize what that meant until later, though.

For that moment, I actually smiled. It was a small but genuine smile, and I felt like an actual person then, too. I reached out and grabbed her warm, small hand in my larger one, and I could feel her almost retract.

"Be my girlfriend," I said, making my voice sound smooth. I couldn't tell if this is what I wanted or not, but I couldn't stop now, so I might as well go all the way through.

"O-okay," she said, relaxing, and she stayed for a while longer.

We talked and drank coffee, but neither of us dared to mention Yosuke, and I tried not to pay mind to the thoughts that yanked at my psychological ankles wailing, "What about Yosuke?"

Once Yukiko finally said that she needed to go, I walked her to the door and held it open for her as she walked out. "I'm glad I came over," she said, and I could tell she meant it.

"Me too," I said, but I didn't really know if I was lying. I leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the cheek. I felt emotionally numb, and the kiss meant nothing to me, but it looked like Yukiko almost squealed.

So she left, and eventually Dojima and Nanako returned. I then retreated back up to my room and began my homework, monotonous and the same as I did any other day. I did some thinking in that time too. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to date someone other than Yosuke, and I didn't know if I wanted to find out, either.

**Derp. Het is so boring. Review?**


	11. Chapter 11

**Ready, set, het. Let's go. Enjoy.**

The next few weeks were interesting, to say the least. I felt a little more alive than I had for the past few months combined, and it was a good feeling although it tore me up inside.

Yukiko was actually a really good girlfriend. She called me every night and visited a lot, and we ended up going on a lot of dates. I'd almost completely forgotten about Yosuke when I was with her. Almost, but not completely. I think I'd gotten pretty good at hiding it when he popped into my mind, though. It was one day in particular, though, that stood out from the rest.

Yukiko and I were sitting along with the rest of the group at our old table at Junes. We were conversing idly, and I could feel the happiness even though Yosuke wasn't there. Everyone appreciated it, too. I could tell they all had missed the old me.

I had Yukiko in my lap, and I had my arm around her waist. She turned around and smiled at me at one point, and I leaned up and kissed her on the lips lightly. She leaned down and whispered in my ear, "I love you."

I suddenly felt my blood run cold. It was the first time I'd ever heard her say that, and it made me nervous. Did I really love her? I didn't initially think I loved Yosuke, but it grew into something really special. Maybe it would be the same with Yukiko…

"I love you too," I whispered back emptily. I didn't think anybody else heard us, but Teddie hooted.

"Oooh!" he shrieked, covering his mouth and pointing at us with his other hand. "Sensei's gonna score with Yuki-chan!" I looked up and so did Yukiko, her face red.

Rise giggled. "You two are the cutest couple!" she squealed, and I smiled, squeezing Yukiko a little tighter.

It wasn't until later that night that I had a complete breakdown. I was home, in fact, I'd just gotten there. It was dark inside the house. Why weren't Dojima and Nanako there? It didn't matter much then, though. My head hurt like crazy and all I wanted to do was lie down.

I strode up the stairs and the throbbing in my head got increasingly worse. By the time I grabbed my door knob and turned it I felt like my cranium was about to explode. But it got worse.

As soon as I opened my door, my eyes flew to my bed, where a disturbing sight lay before me. I saw a grim-looking Yosuke lying on my bed. He was fixed up nicely, but he was pale and appeared rather lifeless. He was on his back with his hands with folded over his chest.

Tears immediately filled my eyes as utter panic entered me. What in the hell was going on? I sprinted in just a few leaps until I reached my bed, immediately dropping to my knees and wrapping my arms around him. It appeared that it was some kind of apparition, though. The image faded as soon as I touched it, and powerful sobs escaped my chest as I took my sheets into my fist and tried pulling them apart in my rage.

"Fuck!" I shouted through my passion, my actions violent as I began pounding the bed. Once I tired I allowed myself to collapse, tears blinding me as my mind raced and my head throbbed with pain.

I clenched my head in between my arms. I felt like if I didn't secure it my head would just fly away with all my dizziness and pain.

"Why!" I screamed into my bed, my tears coming to sting my eyes and remind me that I was still on my bed. I shook my head and turned around, calming down a little, until I saw sitting on my couch the same icy-looking Yosuke that had once been lying on my bed.

"_Why_?" I demanded again, this time calmer, and the close-eyed apparition of my former boyfriend opened its eyes. I felt my breath hitch in my throat as it turned its head slowly and looked at me, the same eerie look that Yosuke's shadow self had given us way back when we had to fight it over a year ago.

The apparition opened its mouth. "If Yosuke could only see you now…" it said in a voice that was horrifyingly close to Yosuke's. Tears streamed down my eyes once again and I knew I was shaking. "You're so pathetic!" it continued with a laugh. "All teary and shaky just at the sight of him. Yet you're…_in love_… with that whore! What would your wonderful, loving Yosuke think of that?"

I clenched my teeth and shut my eyes, but it kept on talking.

"He loves you," it uttered. "Even in this state, Yosuke still loves you!" The thing rose from the couch and began walking toward me. It stopped just within a foot of me and looked down as I looked up. "That's all I leave you with," the apparition whispered. "Just remember that he hasn't forgotten you like _you've_ forgotten _him_."

And with that the thing disappeared, and whether it was really there or just a figment of my horribly active imagination, it made me think. I readied quickly and jumped into bed, rolling myself into a ball as I began taking frantic, quick breaths. I was hyperventilating.

I thought I heard a door open and people come in downstairs—Dojima and Nanako must've been home. I tried quieting myself down with little avail, but the TV was eventually turned on and there was no risk that either of them would hear me.

I was crying like a little newborn baby, just heaving and sobbing. It would've been a joke to try and calm myself down now, so I just let myself cry until I felt ready to vomit. I clenched my eyes shut and forced sleep upon my exhausted psyche.

**Damn, shit's gettin' real! What do you think?**


	12. Chapter 12

**More het… hooray. Things get interesting now, though.**

To sum it up, I'd been dating Yukiko for approximately three weeks. We'd gone as far as making out, but no sex, and we'd said "I love you" a grand total of once. After I'd said it I went home and was greeted by a horrible illusion of my almost-ex-boyfriend. So it was the next day after school that I decided to visit him in the hospital. Of course, Yukiko wanted to go.

"Souji, what are you doing after school today?" Yukiko asked me as she walked a little faster to catch up with me. I didn't know she was walking home that day, or I would've found a way to evade her. I didn't want her there in case I broke down.

I grabbed her hand and laced our fingers together. "I was going to go visit Yosuke in the hospital, actually," I said quietly, smiling at her. I didn't want to look worried or it might make her want to go.

Unfortunately, that was the case anyway.

"Oh, I'll go too!" she said with a smile in return, squeezing my hand as she turned forward and began walking at my pace.

I just laughed softly, knowing I couldn't argue. There wasn't really a valid reason I could provide to my girlfriend that I didn't want her to go. Of course, there were many in my head.

So together we walked to the bus station, where we took the long bus ride to the hospital. I didn't feel quite right bringing Yukiko along, even if Yosuke wasn't conscious. I still felt bad about going out with Yukiko. I didn't love her, _and_ I was betraying the person I really loved.

It wasn't until our elevator reached the floor that Yosuke's room was on that I began to get butterflies, and my chest tightened. I felt very upset, suddenly. I wished Yukiko hadn't come along.

As we came across the door that led into Yosuke's room, we were greeted by a nurse that told us Yosuke had just been fed via feeding tube, and that it was a good time for visitors. I took a deep breath as Yukiko thanked the nurse for information and we went inside.

Neither of us said anything as we entered the dimly-lit room with Yosuke in the middle, lying in a bed. There were miscellanious beeping noises coming from various machines that Yosuke appeared to be attached to and they made me nervous. Suddenly, Yukiko spoke.

"Hi there, Yosuke," she said, her voice soft and motherly, and the hand that wasn't in mine reached out and stroked Yosuke's arm. He didn't stir, and I wasn't surprised. But I was a little nervous to move. I didn't know if I could say anything—even think of anything to say—without exposing how sorry I felt for what I did.

"It's me, Yuki-chan," she continued in the same beautiful voice, "and Souji is here, too." I could've sworn his head moved just a little when Yukiko said my name, but I was probably just seeing things.

I licked my lips and took the chance to start talking. I gulped.

"H-hey, Yosuke," I said, and I could feel my voice cracking a little. Yukiko squeezed my hand, and I went on. "Long time, no see." I felt like I was talking to a brick wall, and I felt now like I desperately wanted to leave. Why had I even decided to come here? Was it because of what happened the previous night? I felt sick.

Yosuke's face didn't look happy in the slumber, as I imagined it should've. It did in the illusion. It didn't even look peaceful. His face looked sad, maybe almost panicked. _I'm sorry,_ I thought. _It's my fault you're unhappy._

The rest of the time we spent there was dedicated to Yukiko telling Yosuke about what we're doing in school or how close graduation was. I was feeling rather full of dread the whole time we were there, and it wasn't until we left that I felt better again.

Yukiko ended up coming over to my house after we got back from the hospital.

Nanako greeted us. "Oh, hello Yuki-neechan!" she said with a smile, gesturing for her to come in. I followed behind her, and Nanako gave me a stern look. "Big bro, you're so late! It's already dark! Where have you been?"

"I'm sorry!" I said with a little laugh in my voice. "Yuki-chan and I went to visit Yosuke in the hospital."

Nanako's stern face fell into one of concern. "Oh!" she said, her voice surprised but quiet. I could tell she wasn't expecting me to say that; I hadn't visited Yosuke at all in the past few months. "How is he?"

"He's… okay," I said softly. "He's not feeling too well right now." Nanako just nodded.

"Daddy's going to be home late tonight," she said as she walked over to the living room and took a seat at the coffee table, looking over at the TV.

"Yuki-chan and I are going to go upstairs," I said as I ushered my girlfriend up the stairs. Nanako didn't look like she wanted to try and entertain us herself, but I didn't want to risk it.

"Okay," Nanako said quietly, not evening glancing in our direction. I could tell that she was worried about Yosuke.

We entered my room quietly, and I closed and locked my door softly. Yukiko went and took a seat on my bed. No illusions this time. I walked over and sat next to her, and she fell back against the pillow. I leaned over her slightly and angled my head, pressing our lips together lightly for a moment.

"Souji…" Yukiko whispered, her eyes closed as I pulled away, and it reminded me of a certain somebody who did the same thing many months ago when I was saying goodbye…

I leaned back in and kissed her again, this time with a little more meaning and force. I could feel her melt down and surrender. Was I really that powerful to her? There was no fighting back like there was when I kissed Yosuke. This was easy.

The kiss easily heated up as it evolved into a tongue kiss, and I explored her mouth with my tongue. She moaned lightly as I did so, and I felt my own body respond by the blood rushing to my groin.

Yukiko wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me down, and I positioned myself so she was completely pinned underneath me. One of my hands wandered down and slipped under the hem of Yukiko's skirt, then proceeded to massage lightly at her inner thighs.

My other hand, along with hers, began stripping her of her long-sleeved shirt. After some careful maneuvering, she was down to just a bra, panties, and her skirt. I'd stopped the hand under her skirt and now unclipped the back of her bra. It took me a few tries to figure it out, but the bra was eventually disposed of and Yukiko's full breasts were at exposal in front of me.

I took a quiet breath before leaning in and kissing her again, one of my hands cupping Yukiko's left breast. She pulled out of the kiss and she squeaked, and I pulled back a little.

"What's wrong?" I asked, trying to sound innocent. At that point, I didn't know if I wanted to continue, but my dick sure did.

Yukiko scurried out from under me, reaching down to the floor to grab her earlier discarded bra. "I-I'm sorry, Souji," she said, her voice sounding upset. "I can't do this." I sat up and sat on the end of the bed.

"Oh," I said softly. "That's… fine."

Yukiko groaned quietly. "It's not fine, she said as she now pulled her shirt on. "I'm too scared." She stood up and I did too, and she high-tailed it downstairs. I was confused, but at the same time I wasn't surprised, although I was unsure why.

"Yuki-chan!" I called after her as she slipped on her shoes and opened the front door. I caught her by the arm as she tried to get away, and I didn't know if Nanako was watching us or not.

"Goodbye, Souji," Yukiko said softly, her voice sounding both hurt. She leaned up and gave me a small kiss on the lips, then ran off, leaving me confused and alone on my doorstep.

I wasn't sure, then, if we were still together. In a way I was hoping we were, but in others I wasn't.

I didn't visit Yosuke at all after that, and it hadn't been more than a week after the ordeal with Yukiko that I got a call from Chie, sounding very desperate.

"Hello?" I answered my cell phone one afternoon after school let out. I was walking home, near the riverbed. The weather was cold and cloudy; there was snow in the forecast for that night.

"Souji!" Chie said into the phone. "Yukiko's gone!"

I gaped, feeling my body go rigid. "What do you mean?" I asked, my heartbeat picking up speed with worry.

"Yukiko's family hasn't seen her in days, and she hasn't been at school," she started. "Her folks called me today and asked if she was with me. I thought she was sick at home. Have you seen her?"

"I saw her last Thursday," I said, making calculations in my head. "She came over and we were going to…" I didn't know how to finish that without telling the truth, so I said, "…uh, have dessert, but she left in a hurry really suddenly."

Chie made a grumbling noise. "Souji, I'll call you back."

**Oh, no! Yuki-chan! Wherever has she gone? Review!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Disappearances… Things are heating up. Go on, read!**

To be honest, we never saw Yukiko again. She just up and left after that one day and no one ever talked to her again. She'd been filed as a missing person, and there had been several police searches, all turning up with nothing. It had taken awhile to get over the sadness, and Chie took it harder than anybody. Chie came over to my house every few days and we'd sit there together and I'd try and comfort her over a cup of tea.

She ended up telling me a lot of things about herself that I doubt anyone else ever knew. There was even a time where she told me something I'm sure no one had guessed about her before.

"Souji…" she said one time as we were sitting down for tea. This day she was drinking jasmine tea, and I had plain green tea. It had been probably a month after that Thursday that Yukiko had ran off. I blew on the steaming liquid in my teacup before taking a small sip and looking Chie's direction.

"What is it?" I asked casually as I watched the brunette stare down into her tea.

"Remember last year, back when we saw Yukiko's shadow?" she asked softly, and that caught my attention quite well. It wasn't often that we spoke of our adventures in the TV those days… there were too many painful memories.

"Y-yeah…" I responded, perhaps even quieter than Chie.

"And Yukiko called me her prince?"

I took a moment to reflect upon that. That was near the beginning of our journey, and the memory was fuzzy. But I did recall it; I don't think there was a moment that we spent in that damned TV that I'd forgotten completely.

"Yeah."

Chie continued. "Well, I… for a long time after that, I really _did_ want to be Yukiko's prince…" I looked at her in surprise now. There had been a rather interesting pattern forming in the texture on the wall, but this seemed to be more of a concern now.

"You mean you were… in love, with Yuki-chan?" I asked, still using Yukiko's nickname out of habit. I saw Chie flinch a little bit when I used that name.

"I… don't know," Chie sighed. "After I heard Yukiko's shadow say out loud that I was her prince, it made me feel so… important, so special to her, like I was the only one that she could count on. But by graduation last year, I felt a lot more unimportant. You were there, and everyone else, too. We had made so many other friends that I felt like Yukiko wouldn't need me anymore, so I guess I kind of… fell out of love with her."

I thought I could understand the point of Chie's story at first, but it seemed that it looped into a circle. I didn't get it, now.

"What do you mean?" I asked, realizing I sounded somewhat dumb, but not going back to clarify.

"I kind of…" Chie paused, and took a breath, blinking slowly before looking up at me. "I kind of fell in love with you instead, Souji."

Hearing this, I was completely dumbfounded. _Maybe I should just come to expect this sort of thing,_ my thoughts sighed at me. Half of my teammates had already confessed undying love to me or something of that sort. Who was next? Teddie?

I did my best to keep a cool face, though. I'd done enough gaping for that day.

"So you're in love with me, even though I was just dating your best friend? The one that you used to be in love with?" I might've been purposefully asking difficult questions, but I needed time to think.

I watched Chie as she blushed. "Well…" she said, her voice sounding rather bashful, "There _was_ some jealousy on my part when you were with Yukiko…"

I just sighed, but quietly, and in a way that hopefully didn't sound rude. The next action of Chie's, however, I wasn't expecting. I was more accustomed to Yukiko's mannerisms at this point, and she was always very shy and a little timid about things. Chie crawled over to me from the side of the table at which she sat, and she leaned forward to press her lips against mine.

She deepened the kiss delicately but forcefully, and I just surrendered. I was completely done with fighting anything; my mind was beginning to feel numb. I kissed back tenderly until she pulled away, and I gave a small smile.

"So, uh…" she breathed, and it was rather obvious that she was flustered.

I just shook my head. "So does that mean you want me to be your boyfriend?"

After a couple moments of biting her lip nervously, Chie sat back on her heels and nodded.

"Well, how could I turn down such a pretty face?" I said, my voice velvety smooth, but it resonated as almost mocking in my head.

Chie didn't seem to notice, though. Her blushing face showed me a challenging look. "Kiss me," she said, her voice soft, airy, and gentle.

Following her command, I took the initiative and, well, kissed her. It went farther than that, though I'll spare the details.

The end of the situation took place upstairs in my bedroom, where I was now laying beside Chie in bed, who had fallen asleep in my arms. She felt so delicate and vulnerable—so soft and so fragile. She felt exactly like, well… a _girl_. Soft skin. Soft hair. A fruity, floral scent that I could now smell on even my pillow.

As I lay there, a sleeping Chie lying against me, my mind slowly crept to thoughts of Yosuke. Maybe I wouldn't admit it, especially then, but Yosuke was still a part of everything I did.

Chie shifted a little and sighed a long, soprano sigh, and I fought the tears welling up in my eyes.

**Girls are such conniving bitches, eh? Review.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter fourteen funtimes yay.**

If I had been able to feel anything at all, I'm sure I would've been very happy. Of course, I was still rather numb… From that, I was sure I'd never recover. There was no point in moping about and letting myself lie around like a lump, though. If I was going to be miserable no matter what I did, I might as well make somebody happy in being miserable. If I had been the average straight guy, without all my predicaments, I would've cherished Chie a lot more.

Chie… she insisted on being so physical, all the time. If it wasn't touching, it was feeling. If I didn't caress her one moment, she'd squeeze me the next. She was never shy in public with touching or kissing. I'm sure the people around us thought she was a total slut, but she didn't seem to care.

We'd sort of ceased to hang out with the rest of our friends. I missed being around them quite a bit, but it wasn't the same without Yosuke or Yukiko there, and everyone else knew it, too. Communication with Rise and Naoto had ended almost completely, besides seeing them at school every once in a while. I never talked to them, anyway. Teddie was staying with Rise, and though I saw him more than the girls, it still wasn't often. He was still just as naïve as ever. Kanji… I'm not sure if he had any faith left in me. I talked to him even less than the girls. In fact, upon seeing him in the hallways, he would even turn his head or give me a dirty look. I could easily guess how he felt about me running around with girls, and even sleeping with Chie, when Yosuke was in a coma.

On the subject… No longer was I a virgin. I didn't think about it much at first, but before the accident, I'd planned on losing it to Yosuke. That didn't seem to affect me then, though. I was getting my bodily satisfaction, and Chie was getting the "love" she wanted or needed.

The illusions began to return, though, and they sought vengeance. If the fake Yosuke in my head chided me for telling Yukiko that I love her, then it would nearly kill me for having sex with Chie.

Right?

So of course, it was about a month after Chie and I had first consummated our relationship that my little friend began to return. I'd just gotten home from school one day, and I found an empty house. Nanako must've been with a friend.

It didn't take me long to figure out what was happening when from the kitchen came a soft singing. It was a light tenor voice that sang… the voice, very familiar. The words were also very familiar, but in this context, terrifyingly haunting.

"Every day's great at your Junes."

I whipped my head to look immediately. Sure enough, there was a cute little Yosuke, half-hidden behind the refrigerator, in my kitchen. He wore his casual clothes. Even his headphones were in place around his neck, and it hurt my heart to see him looking so… normal.

"Except…" the thing whispered, "nothing's great. Is it?"

I cringed as it spoke. Why did this hallucination have to have the evil, evil instrument of Yosuke's voice?

"Well, maybe for _you_," it continued. "You're fucking Chie! You must be such a proud, straight guy. Your parents must be proud. Dojima must be proud. Nanako must be _so_ proud." It paused as its voice broke into sobs. "Yosuke must be _so__fucking__proud_!"

"Why won't you leave me alone?" I demanded, but I was sure I knew the answer already.

"I'm sure you know," it said, as if reading my mind. "I represent what Yosuke feels… Or more accurately, what he would be feeling. To be exact, I'm what you assume he'd feel if he knew about everything you've done." It sounded like my perfect demise.

The thing continued without fail, but its voice got lighter. "You still love him," it quoth. "You feel like you would die if Yosuke knew about all this shameful sex with Chie, and your faked love for two women. Maybe then, you should die. Would it not be better for you both that way?"

"No!" I retorted quickly. "I can't die! If I die alone… I'll never see him again…" I could feel tears welling in my eyes and sobs forming in my chest. I swallowed it all. "Yosuke isn't dead to me! I know he's alive!" The thing looked surprised as I carried on. "He's not here. That's true, and I know it. But I'm not stupid. I know he's still alive and still breathing. That much means that even if I die, I won't be happy, because Yosuke won't be with me then, anyway."

The thing chuckled lowly. "You're dumb," it sighed. "Will Yosuke still want you, even when he wakes up someday? You can't hide what you've done with Yukiko and Chie from him. When he finds out that your love is all used up, will he not just toss you to the street? Tell me, Souji, have you ever kept the core of an apple instead of throwing it away?"

"I'm not all used up!" I yelled. If there was anyone else around who happened to be listening, they would've thought me crazy, for sure. Then again, I probably was crazy. "I can't run out of love if the only love I have is for Yosuke!"

Most of the things I was saying were things I hadn't even admitted to myself yet. This felt so odd, and it only got worse as the thing stepped out from behind the refrigerator and began walking toward me.

"Get away!" I demanded, but it didn't stop. When it did, it was only a bit more than a foot away from me.

"I'm more than the ghost of your thoughts," the apparition told me. "I'm everything that defines the deepest insanities of your mind. If I leave, will you be normal? Or maybe you'll die. Your insanity seems to be the only thing keeping you alive right now."

"Aaaarghh!" I groaned, and the transparent Yosuke moved further toward me. It leaned in closely and acted as if it would kiss me. Its lips touched mine, and instead of anything solid or warm, it just felt like a cool draft against my lips. It disappeared slowly after that, fading away, leaving me alone in the empty house.

I fell to my knees as I began to cry, and I didn't want to deal with this anymore. How surprising would it be for Nanako or Dojima to return home and find me collapsed on the floor? Probably very. I forced myself up and into the living room, where I let myself go limp onto the couch. I laid there until I stopped crying, and I wiped my eyes. I needed to grow the hell up and stop crying all the time.

**God, I love writing for Yosuke's apparition. Makes my fucking day. Review?**


	15. Chapter 15

**Definitely remember when I wrote the original version of this chapter. I was babysitting my neighbor's one-year-old grandson. Good times. He was napping, though… don't worry.**

"Get back here!" I called after Chie as she took one of my sandals and began running down the length of the beach. She was giggling as she ran, and she looked a lot like a toddler playing a prank on their parent.

"You'll have to make me!" she yelled back as she made her way quickly across the beach. I stood up and like lightning was behind her. I had never run on a track team, or been much into races, but I was pretty fit for the job. As I closed in on her petite figure, I wrapped my arms around her and tackled her into the sand, being careful not to land on her and crush her.

"Souji!" she laughed as she fell and she hit me lightly with the sandal she held.

"Hey, that hurt," I whined playfully, and she leaned up and kissed where she'd hit lightly. I smiled and stood up, grabbing her hands and pulling her up with me. "You're a little troublemaker, missy," I continued. "You'll have to be punished."

"How are you going to do _that_?" she asked, her voice getting a little lower and her eyes narrowing a bit.

"Hey, hey," I scolded jokingly. "Not here. There are too many others here."

We had decided that, since it was nearing spring, it would be a fun time to go to the beach. The day wasn't too hot, but it was perfect for wading in the water and sitting on the beach to tan. We'd taken along Naoto, Kanji, Rise, and Teddie, since they had all insisted on spending some time together. Graduation was quickly approaching, and our younger friends feared they would never see us again.

"Hey, get back over here!" came a high-pitched, almost shrill voice from back where I had just been sitting. It was Rise, complete with her hair in a single pony tail and her luscious orange bikini tied tightly to her thin but figured body. Her creamy skin shone and glimmered with tanning oil, and she yielded far more sex appeal than Chie. That, of course, was something I would never act upon. I was in love with Chie**…** or, so she thought, anyway.

As Chie and I walked back to where everyone else resided, under big beach umbrellas and on top of towels, I happened to notice that Kanji wasn't with them anymore. I cocked my head to look around and finally found him; he was sitting near the water, and when the tide would rush in a little, it would just reach his toes. He looked almost melancholy, sitting there alone.

I looked at Chie. She was now sitting, and I leaned down to say softly, "I'm going to go talk to Kanji. He looks lonely." Chie smiled and nodded, and I walked over to him.

Kanji meant a lot to me as a friend. He'd helped me through so many things, and no matter what, he always seemed to understand what was going on when I was down. He had comforted me when Yosuke was first shot. He let me cry on his shoulder on more than one occasion, literally, and he'd never done anything to upset me. Kanji was like a brother to me.

I approached him slowly and I sat down next to him, my head turned toward him. "Kanji?" I said.

He looked at me and gave me a soft smile. "Hiya," he said, his deep voice quiet. There now didn't seem to be much noise, besides the waves on the beach.

"Are you alright?" I asked, as if I had any right to ask that of someone. I was barely 'alright' myself. Nevertheless, he answered.

"Why?" he asked, returning my question with another. "Do I look upset?"

I gave him a sympathetic smile. "Yeah, a little," I replied. "You look sort of depressed."

"Oh," he said, "sorry. I didn't mean to make you worry. I just**…**" he paused without finishing, and I sighed. I gave him a look that told him to continue, so he did. "Everything's just confusing right now, is all."

"How so?" I asked. I knew what he was talking about for the most part, but it could've been something different.

"I think I like someone, Souji," he said softly, looking back out at the ocean, and not myself, anymore.

I gulped. "Wait, what?" I asked dumbly. I had heard clearly what he said, but it definitely wasn't what I was expecting. "Who is it?"

"It's**…** someone you know," he said quietly. "Cute, innocently charming**…** he's really hard _not_ to love**…**"

I almost stopped him to say, _"Wait, he?"_, but I knew better than that. That might hurt his feelings. Instead I just took a deep breath. I pretty much suspected that Kanji was gay, but I never expected him to actually _like men_. This caught me by surprise.

"Well?" I asked. "Who is it then?"

He mumbled something, but he was quiet and turned the other way, so it was unclear.

"Huh?"

"It's Teddie, okay?" he said, his voice clearer, but still quiet, as he turned toward me. His face was flushed and he looked really ashamed of himself.

"You**…** you like Teddie?" I asked, my face softening to a smile.

"Y-yeah, I think so," he said, gulping. "But it's not that easy! Teddie obviously likes girls, Souji**…** I think I'm out of luck**…**"

I laughed. "Teddie's a dork," I said. "He just flirts with Rise because he sees other guys do it. If you told him you like him, he could like you, too."

Kanji laughed lightly. "I doubt it," he said. "There isn't much to like about me. I'm a rebel, a bad guy. I'm not good-looking, and I've got a bad personality."

"Who told you that?" I asked, my voice taking on a stern element. "You've always been there for me, Kanji! You've never let me down. Fuck that. You always listen and you give some of the best advice in the world. You're not a rebel and you're someone who Teddie would be stupid not to love."

Kanji's face looked surprised as he stared down into his lap. "S…Souji…" he sighed. "Thanks."

"For what?" I asked. "Everyone deserves the truth."

He looked up at me and laughed, and I smiled brightly. The smile didn't remain, though, when Kanji decided to inquire about the one thing I dreaded.

"So… what about you and Chie?" he asked. "How are things between you two?" His voice, though well-masked, still reflected the disappointment I knew he had in me.

"She… she really likes me, that's for sure…" I said softly, swallowing the lump I could feel begin to form in my throat.

"I can see that," Kanji remarked, and I sighed. "Have you two… y'know… done _it_?" I could tell he was hoping for a no, and I wished I could give him one.

I just nodded without a word, and he nodded back in return. "Do you really love her?"

"Do I look like I'm in love?" I said quickly in response.

Kanji shrugged. "Not now, but when you're with her, you look drained of all emotion. Like she doesn't make you feel a thing. That's just my opinion, though…" We both looked over, where we heard Naoto yelling as Rise was trying to remove her T-shirt. "No one else seems to notice. Especially Chie." He took a breath. "It's probably the sex."

I cocked my head. "Emotionless, huh?" I said with a sigh. "That's… about how I feel. Numb, mostly. But when I'm in bed with her, that just doesn't seem to matter. When I've got it up, all these lies of love pour from my mouth, and I can't stop them until it's too late."

Kanji didn't reply right away. I assume he was thinking. "Well… are you going to end it?" he asked me, and I didn't know whether I should answer it.

Ignoring the shrieks I was hearing behind us, I thought carefully about my words. "I… I have to," I replied. "I don't love her, and it isn't fair to her. It's just… when her skirt comes off, my body doesn't care about her feelings, my feelings, or…"

"Or how Yosuke would feel."

Kanji completed the sentence for me, because he probably already knew that's what I was thinking and that I wouldn't say it.

"…yeah."

We were both silent then; we both knew better than to say anything and break the silence. Of course, though, someone broke it for us.

"Kanji! Souji!" we heard the girls calling us from their spot on the beach. We both turned around just in time to see a beach ball coming toward us, and I reached out and caught it. Chie gave me a bright smile.

"Come on, you guys, let's play!" she said, her voice sounding incredibly happy. Instead of displaying the stress I felt, I just sighed and smiled back.

"Okay!" I called back, and I got up from my spot. I pulled Kanji up with me, and he smiled softly at me. With a small smile back of my own, things seemed to be okay.

**Having a good time reading this? Lemme know. Review~. Interested in Kanji's little crush? Read on, then read the sequel, **_**Mission: Impossible**_**.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Exciting things are about to happen, man. Chapter sixteen—get ready.**

After our trip to the beach had past and was gone, it was a few weeks later that graduation was fast approaching us seniors. Our younger friends were getting sadder each day, but we could only think of our futures. Chie and I had continued our physical relationship as well as our romantic relationship, and she told me every day how much she loved me. Responding blankly I would smile and nod.

Before long, graduation was only a week away, and I could barely stand the air that filled the school in these days. There was so much hustle and bustle that it hurt my head. So many voices spoke at once; some to me, some to others. I couldn't listen to any of them.

I'd begun to notice that I was getting headaches quite frequently. Out in public and around people besides Nanako and Dojima, mostly, but I'd get the occasional headache while sitting in my room, too. But I was also beginning to see the phantom Yosuke more often as well, and after a night of talking with him the next day I'd be almost completely headache-free. Some nights I would even find myself asking him to come and visit, and he would.

He'd show up while I lay on my bed, sitting on my couch, and he would tell me about how much Yosuke still loved me. I'd cry for a while as he just sat and watched, and eventually drift off to sleep. When I awoke in the morning, he'd be gone without a trace.

After a particularly long session of listening to Yosuke talk, and an even longer session of tears, I had fallen asleep pretty peacefully. Dreamless the whole night, I awoke to a dreadful realization: Today was the day of my graduation.

After graduation I would have the rest of spring and summer, and my parents I could only _know_ would demand that I return home. But there was no way that I could now, after everything that happened. I could always just flat out say no, though; I was an adult. Done with school and of legal age. I could do whatever I wanted, within the boundaries of the law.

But today was the present, and I could deal with the parent problem when it happened.

The previous day was our last day of school, and today was our first day of break. But at seven o'clock this evening it would officially be the first day of the rest of our lives.

I sat up in my bed in a sloth-like fashion and I took a deep breath. I grabbed my cell phone off of my nightstand and opened it up to find three new text messages. Two of them were from Chie, and one was from Kanji.

The two from Chie came first, and the first just said "good morning :)", from more than three hours earlier. The other from her read, "let's celebrate graduation tonight at your place, ok? ;)" It was obvious what she meant by that, and I almost rolled my eyes at the thought. That message was from about fifteen minutes earlier.

Last was the text message from Kanji. As the message loaded, I faintly wondered if it was about what he'd told me at the beach a few weeks ago. As far as I knew, he hadn't taken any action, so maybe now he finally had.

"Call me as soon as you wake up," it read, and I rubbed at my eyes for a moment before pressing the green button. The text had been sent about ten minutes before I woke up, which, now looking at the clock, was about 10:30AM.

Kanji answered on the second ring, his voice urgent. "Souji!" he gasped at me.

"H-hey, Kanji," I said, my voice a little groggy from sleep. "I just woke up."

There was silence on the line for a moment before Kanji's voice said quietly, "You're not the only one."

I cleared my throat and cocked my head in confusion. "Wh…what?" I asked, and my heart sort of stopped beating, the very first thought coming to my mind the most obvious one.

"Yosuke! He's awake!"

I felt myself freeze. Was that even possible? I'd lived the past four months of my life completely Yosuke-free, in a world where that person barely existed at all. The only place I ever saw him was in my dreams and, occasionally, floating about my room.

"H-he's… what…?" my voice felt far-off with the rest of the world. I blinked slowly.

"He started showing signs of consciousness at about four-thirty this morning," Kanji explained, his voice still as frantic as before. "The nurses called the doctors, and he's… awake."

When I was silent on my end, Kanji groaned.

"Get dressed and get downstairs," he commanded. "I'm coming over." The other line cut off, and I closed my phone carefully and set it on the nightstand.

I stared down into my lap for a moment before it occurred to me that Kanji would be here soon. Will power forced me up from my spot, and my body, which felt light as a feather, dressed itself and made itself presentable.

Nanako was still in school, so when I went downstairs, the house was completely empty. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and I grabbed it out. It was from Chie. "Souji?" said the text, but I just shut my phone and ignored it. I didn't have time for that.

Soon enough, there was a knock at my door, and after I realized I'd just been standing in the middle of the room for the past five minutes, I turned the door knob and there stood Kanji. His brow was furrowed and he looked just as panicky and frantic as he had sounded on the phone.

"Come in," I said, my voice quiet, and my face expressionless. Kanji gave me a sympathetic expression as he stepped inside.

And suddenly, as I was shutting the door, everything hit me again. Yosuke was awake, so… what was I still doing at home?

"Can we go see him?" I asked instantly as I whirled around to face him.

Kanji took a breath and began to explain. "Well… when he woke up, he was completely conscious, but not fully aware. He didn't talk or anything, and he was kind of… in a daze. At least, that's what the nurse that called told me."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "But… can we visit him?" I asked, nervous for the answer.

"When I asked the nurse," Kanji began, "she said that Yosuke's only been awake for a few minutes at a time for the last few hours. He's been sleeping most of the day."

"Sleeping?" I asked, a little confused. "But he just woke up… right?"

"Well, yeah," replied Kanji. "But he's exhausted."

"Oh…" I sighed, my face falling a little.

Kanji noticed my expression and he shook his head. "We can still go, though," he said quickly. "It might just be kind of… weird. He's not talking. He… might not even_ remember _us." Kanji spoke very carefully.

I'd expected that much, but it still hurt to hear it. "Yeah…" I said softly. There was a moment of silence between us.

"Isn't graduation tonight?" Kanji asked, and I nearly groaned at the thought.

"It's only almost eleven," I said. "If we go now, I'll be back in time. It's not until seven."

Kanji hesitated a bit. "So… you're sure you want to go?" he asked.

I took a deep breath. "Yeah. Let's go."

There were no words to describe how I was feeling inside. I couldn't tell if I was happy, or scared, nervous, hopeful, or pessimistic, or maybe all of that.

And before I could process any of it, I found myself standing next to Kanji outside the door to Yosuke's room.


	17. Chapter 17

**Drama. Ready? I know I am… Here we go.**

As we waited in front of the door to Yosuke's room, a nurse slid out of the room with a smile on her face.

"Mr. Hanamura has just woken up from a nap," she said softly. "You two are the first visitors he's had since he came to this morning, so try not to frighten him with too much moving or loud noise. We don't want to make him nervous."

I nodded, and Kanji replied, "Yeah, no problem." The nurse smiled again and turned around, opening the door slowly.

My heart was pounding louder and faster than I ever imagined it could, and I closed my eyes for a moment as the nurse and Kanji went in before me. Taking a deep breath, I opened up my eyes once again and stepped up behind my friend.

"Mr. Hanamura," the nurse said, her voice whisper-soft. "Your friends are here to see you."

I looked to the bed, and my heart nearly stopped beating when I realized that Yosuke was looking back _at_ me. When our eyes met, all the memories I'd repressed of us flooded back to me.

"Yosuke…" I said, my voice even softer than the nurse's. He moved a little when I said his name, and opened his mouth.

"Sou…" he managed to stutter, and my eyes, along with those of Kanji and the nurse, widened.

"Mr. Hanamura?" the nurse inquired, sounding completely astonished.

Yosuke paid the nurse no attention, but continued to look in my direction. He blinked a couple of times and moved his hand off of the hospital bed, extending it out to me.

I stepped closer again and reached out without really thinking, and took his hand in mine. He looked surprised, his eyes meeting mine nervously.

"Sou…Souji," he said, his voice soft and groggy. But there was no debating that that voice, no matter how tired, was all Yosuke.

I could feel the eyes of Kanji and the nurse—especially the nurse. She had no idea that Yosuke and I were—or had been—a couple, so this probably looked incredibly odd, to say the least.

"Yosuke," I said to him, "Do you remember me?" I was so terrified of the answer, but I had to ask. He'd just said my name, though, so was there even a chance he didn't remember?

Yosuke cleared his throat softly. "Of… course," he said, a smile gracing his lips. "I'm Yosuke. You're Souji. And…" he gave me his classic, but weak, grin that just screamed _from Yosuke, with love_. "I love you."

The words he spoke made my heart skip a beat. For months, behind the backs of Yukiko and Chie, I'd been secretly longing for those words from that very mouth. To hear them now, my heart felt complete. I had no idea how much time had passed when I realized I hadn't said anything back.

"Yosuke, I love you, too," I sighed.

It wasn't more than two seconds after the completion of that sentence that we all heard the door open again, and we all looked simultaneously to see that the next person to come in was none other than Chie.

"Yosuke!" she exclaimed quietly as she walked in. "Good morning!"

"H-hi, Chie," Yosuke said, sounding a little wobbly. "It's… been awhile."

Kanji stepped forward now and leaned to Chie, whispering something in her ear. Her mouth fell open a little when she heard what he had said, but she nodded and stepped up next to me, taking my free hand.

Yosuke held my other hand still, and looked puzzledly at the two of us. I was beginning to panic on the inside. Among all the joy, I'd forgotten about Chie completely. How would Yosuke react to that kind of shock, and right after he woke up from a four-month coma? Was that kind of news even healthy for someone in his condition? Nevertheless…

"Yosuke, Souji and me are dating," she said, a small, apologetic smile on her face.

Worse than I imagined, the look on Yosuke's face reflected a miserable confusion. "Wh…what?" he said, sounding a little breathless now. He let go of my hand and it suddenly felt torturously cold. "S-S-Souji? I… I don't get it…"

"Yosuke…" I whispered. "I'm so, _so_ sorry."

"But you… you said you love me!" he said, sounding horribly insecure. "The last thing I remember before this god damned coma was you, kissing me. And even just now…"

I looked over at Kanji, who had a look of melancholy in his eyes. If he ever were to be disappointed in me, it was definitely now.

"You said you loved me too!" I could see tears beginning to swell in Yosuke's eyes, and it broke my heart. "Did you lie?" he demanded.

It was a real question that deserved an honest answer, but could I manage to tell him? To reveal the truth to Chie?

"I didn't lie," I said finally, and I felt Chie's grip on my hand tighten.

"What?" she said, sounding confused.

"But, Yosuke," I said, my voice now doing as it pleased without permission from my heart. "I've moved on. I'll love you forever, but Chie is my girlfriend now. I'm sorry."

Once I saw it, I couldn't get Yosuke's expression out of my head. He looked so hurt that it pained even me, and I couldn't bear to look. I let go of Chie's hand and I turned to leave as Kanji tried to stop me.

"Souji!" he called, but I didn't turn around. I could see that at some point the nurse had gone, probably because she felt out-of-place, like she was invading our privacy. Probably a smart move on her part.

Chie followed me out as Kanji stayed behind, and when I stopped outside the door, Chie stopped with me and put her hand on my back.

"I'm sorry, Souji," she said softly, but her words didn't comfort me a bit. I didn't know what drove me to say what I'd said back in the room, after telling the phantom Yosuke how much I wanted him back, and I felt worse than horrible. There was no way I could keep going with Chie, but could I dump her after she was the reason I turned Yosuke's love away?

"Chie… I lied to you both," I admitted to her after a few moments. Something hit me, and I suddenly knew why I _couldn't_ love Chie. The reason I could fuck endlessly but not feel a thing, and the shame as a result made me say what I had to Yosuke.

The dream I had, months ago. Yosuke had begun crying, worried about me falling in love with someone else.

_"Oh…" Yosuke said in a tired voice, but his tone became more serious suddenly. "Souji… promise me that… you won't ever fall in love with a girl." It was a bit out of the blue and I jumped a bit at the words. He looked at me with a desperate expression._

"_What are you talking about?" I asked slowly, giving him a confused look. After that day at Samegawa River—the day he'd told me he liked me—I'd told him that I was bisexual, not gay. He told me he was gay, but my sexuality had never seemed to be a problem before. Why did it seem to suddenly be an issue?_

_"I guess it's nothing, but… I just have this weird feeling that one of the girls has her eye on you…" He looked at me and I was surprised. "I figured that if we had sex it would mean we were really in love… and I wouldn't have to worry about losing you to a girl." Yosuke was close to tears, I could tell, and it wasn't like him at all. He was choking on his words and beginning to sniffle. I was worried; I didn't know what to do about crying._

"_I love you, Yosuke," I told him. "I don't want to make any promises because I don't want to break them… but if we're being honest, I love you more than I could ever love a girl. Or anybody else, for that matter." I wiped the first tear to flee from his eye and looked into at him seriously to show him I meant it. I scooted around the table and turned Yosuke's head to mine with my hand. He looked at me sadly, tears running down from both eyes._

_"Souji, I don't want to lose you," he cried, grabbing me and burying his face in my chest. I kissed the top of his head lovingly._

"You were… lying?" Chie asked, sounding worried. "What do you mean?"

"Chie, I'm not over Yosuke." I said it firmly, and she just stared at me looking scared. "I never stopped loving him, and… I've never loved you. Not for a minute. Yuki either. Yosuke is the only one I ever…" I was cut off by a firm, crisp slap to my right cheek. I could see that Chie was about to cry and she began to run off. I watched her go, and I wanted to go back to the room that still waited, but I couldn't bear to see Yosuke's sweet face in pain. Instead I started to leave the hospital slowly, walking through the bleached-white building. There were no two ways around my situation now. I'd just revealed the truth to Chie and I broke Yosuke's heart, too. What was left for me?


	18. Chapter 18

**Shiny, improved chapter eighteen. Out of all the changes I've made to this story (which, believe me, is a lot. I wrote out the original plot for this story when I was in the eighth grade), THIS CHAPTER has**_**always**_**stayed the same. Even in the revamp, there is very little that is different than the original. The first part of this chapter is told from Souji's POV as usual, while the second is third-person but Yosuke-centric. Enjoy!**

Graduation came and went that night, and as we left the stadium at which it was held, we had the pride of knowing we were finished with school. Chie had been there, and though there were only a few people in between us, she didn't so much as look in my direction. She looked… broken, and I couldn't bring myself to feel bad for her.

"Congratulations, big bro!" Nanako exclaimed when we'd arrived home. Dojima gave me a proud look, and I returned it with a smile, despite how awkward and unnatural my lips felt in this position.

Being at that graduation was _so_ different than how I thought it would've been seven or eight months ago. I imagined standing next to Chie and Yosuke and Yukiko, smiling with all of our peers as we gazed out to the future. But that night, as I stood alone, all I could think about how I felt futureless without Yosuke.

After the dinner that Nanako had prepared for us, I quickly found my way upstairs and onto my bed where the tears immediately began. I felt like such a girl… I'd done _nothing_ but cry lately.

I screamed into my pillow as I felt the chilled water of regret wash over me; how could I have said what I did?

Almost as soon as I'd started my fit, I felt a vibration in my pocket, and a ring filled my ears. Trying to compose myself, I saw that it was Kanji calling, and I immediately flipped open the device.

"Kanji," I sobbed into the phone as soon as I answered. "I'm still in love with him. I lied. And—"

"Really?" the voice on the other end asked, but it wasn't Kanji's deep voice. It was light, melancholic, smooth, and hopeful. It was Yosuke. What was he doing with Kanji's phone, and why did he call me?

"Yo…suke…" I said, my sobs becoming quieter, and I hung up the phone, pressing the "end" button and shutting it gently. Well… now he knew. I pulled the covers up to my shoulders and laid still. I'd stopped crying even though I was in no way comforted, and I felt a small smile creep onto my lips. Was I dying? Was this what it felt like? Perhaps not, as I'd done nothing to induce it, but I felt completely empty, like I could leave this world any moment. I knew what I needed: I needed to be saved. A prince charming to ride up on a white steed. Hold me, tell me it's okay, don't let go. Let me fall asleep and don't leave before I wake up. Imagining my prince… my height, light brown messy hair, a goofy disposition, and a sexy smile that could get me with one look. His weight shifted asymmetrically to one foot, he holds out his hand and I take it. He pulls me closer. Taking the headphones from around his neck he places the phones over my ears, where a soft, beautiful piano riff is flowing. As he kisses me, I find myself slowly losing consciousness, and I fall into his arms, fast asleep. With nothing to do and nowhere to go, he stays with me, his arms cradling me gently as I slumber. Love was a funny thing… maybe I didn't need it. Maybe all I needed was warmth and a place to sleep. Yes… that sounded nice. All the warmth and comfort of love without the heartache? Paradise. I snuggle in closer and I fall deeper into sub-consciousness.

* * *

"Yosuke, it's late… the nurse just asked me to leave." Kanji reentered the room after being gone a moment, a look of apology in his eyes. It was already 10:30 at night, and although Yosuke was unbelievably tired, he definitely didn't want to be alone, now of all times. Having just heard, completely by accident, that Souji was still in love with him. Even after Souji had realized who heard his confession, Yosuke still was rejected, and he hadn't the slightest idea why.

Yosuke only felt a tiny bit of anger toward Souji for all that he'd done, even after Kanji explained Yukiko as well, her disappearance, _and_ all the sex. To Yosuke, though, none of that mattered. He was gone for months and he well understood that. His life as he knew it was on pause, but everyone else kept living. What Souji did, although unfaithful and desperate, is what most in his position would've. Life goes on with or without you, after all. Yosuke wanted Souji back and that was all there was to it. Talking could happen later.

Souji would have none of that, though, apparently. For the next two months of Yosuke being in the hospital, the silver-haired man had no business with anyone but the two he lived with. He wouldn't answer the phone or text messages from Kanji, Yosuke, or even Chie, who was implored by the prior two to make sure Souji was okay. No answer for any of them, though. Eventually Kanji even tried visiting, only to be told by Nanako that Souji wasn't feeling well. For two months this carried on… and finally, Yosuke was released to go home at long last.

But he was nearly ready to give up.

On the tearful day Yosuke returned to his parents, he felt awful. He'd called Souji as least five times, leaving voicemails, but to no avail. He got no calls back or any recognition from him at all.

Wobbly and unconfident, Yosuke stumbled upstairs by himself, refusing help from either of his parents. It was after dinner and Yosuke just wanted the warmth of his bed underneath him and the comfort of his covers over him.

His bed was exactly as tousled as he'd left it months ago, on the day he left to meet Souji in the park, and it made his heart beat a little faster to think about it. He gently let himself fall into the bed and he pulled up the covers, his eyes falling shut.

A somewhat fitful sleep came about him as a dream of he and Souji flashed before him. Yosuke was a prince; a charming, handsome prince, that swept Souji off his feet and kissed him gently.

Fitful sleep led to an unpleasant awakening at exactly midnight, where Yosuke stirred and rose from his sheets to sit up. He was sweaty and uncomfortably warm, and after a few seconds he realized he was dark as a rock. A look of shock came to his face and he not only discovered this, but that there was a familiar flow coming from the TV. He could hear rain outside, and rough static from the glowing box. Had he left the TV on? That was a definite no. He stood up from his bed and took off the pants he'd been wearing, leaving him only in a T-shirt and boxers. He approached the TV slowly and kneeled in front of it, where a faint figure began to appear out of the static. It was a girl's figure, and Yosuke watched it move carefully. As she came into focus, it was obvious who the figure was… Saki Konishi. It'd taken months for Yosuke to recover from the death of his senpai, so what was the deceased upperclassman doing on his TV? This couldn't be… the Midnight Channel.

Saki came into full view now, and she was just as alive as ever, so it appeared. To accompany that she was also completely nude. Yosuke watched her hungrily, pained and confused by the sight he beheld.

"Yosuke," she purred as she came closer to the screen. "Are you all alone?"

"Yes… Saki-senpai." Yosuke's answer was quiet and obedient, and he felt himself getting even hotter. Although he had no idea what was going on, it didn't seem odd. It seemed perfectly normal.

"And… are you lonely?" she asked, and Yosuke nodded slowly and sadly. "Let me love you, Yosuke. I won't abandon you like Souji did."

Yosuke mouthed that he loved her, but the girl behind the glass only laughed.

"Yosuke, let me see it," she commanded, and Yosuke complied immediately. He slipped the elastic of his boxers carefully over his arousal, the air relieving to the heat under his skin. He moaned softly as he took hold of his manhood, looking into Saki's eyes intently.

"Yes, Yosuke," she whispered. "I love you."

"I've always loved you, Saki-senpai. I love you." Yosuke could feel reality slipping away as he stroked himself carefully. "I don't… need… Souji…" The pleasure overrode the sense of unnaturalness that the whole situation gave off, and with a groan and a sigh, Yosuke leaned in and came, his orgasm washing over him like warm water. His release pulsed out, a bit streaming onto the TV.

"Saki… senpai…" Yosuke breathed, and as soon as he did, the screen went black. Further confused and more exhausted than ever, Yosuke crawled back to his bed, where deep sleep came quickly to him this time.

**Everyone's losing their head! Madness! Review?**


	19. Chapter 19

**Last chapter… Sad day! But I hope you like it. The sequel, **_**Mission: Impossible**_**, is up. Go read.**

It was mid-July, about two months since graduation, and I literally hadn't seen outside the house since the night Yosuke actually heard my confession. Nanako was constantly asking me if I was okay, and even Dojima could tell that something was wrong. I was depressed by every definition of the word, and I couldn't even pinpoint exactly how I'd gotten there. I'd been relentlessly pelted with text messaged and phone calls from just about everyone, but I didn't answer anything. I guess Kanji even tried to visit once, but I told Nanako to tell him I wasn't feeling well. It's not like it was a lie. About a week after that, I was sitting idly on my couch in the afternoon when my door flew open. I whipped my head around to see Kanji standing in my doorway. Behind him, I could see a shadowy Yosuke, standing there with a pained expression, but not looking up. I felt myself freeze in fear.

Kanji's face housed an enraged expression and he entered my room, approaching me quickly and pulling back his arm. My eyes moved over to where his big hand had clenched into a fist, and his other hand had the front of my shirt in almost no time. He was going to hit me, but I made no moves to stop him. I knew I deserved it.

"Bastard," Kanji grunted at me. "Mind letting us know that you aren't fucking _dead_ or something!" I could feel anger radiating from him like steam from boiling water. His fist moved swiftly toward me, until we both heard something that made us both stop in our tracks.

"Kanji, stop."

"The order came in a soft but forceful voice that sounded almost tearful, but not quite there yet. It was still strong. We both looked over to where the voice had come from, and Yosuke was finally looking up.

Kanji sighed in frustration and released his grip on my shirt, his fist unclenching and dropping to his side. Yosuke has stopped him… but why? I'm certain that he agreed I deserved it. Regardless, Kanji took a few steps back and dropped his head, and Yosuke began to walk toward me. I could feel my heart pounding all the way in my ears with an indescribably nervousness. I'd imagined myself in this position so many times, but I hadn't the faintest idea of what I should say or do. Yosuke was soon standing directly in front of me, and I looked up into his eyes, really looking into his soul, for the first time in almost a year. I could feel a lump forming in my throat, but damn it—I did _not_ want to cry.

Before I knew what was happening, I saw Yosuke drop down into my and felt a warm, scrawny pair of arms embrace me around the torso. His figure fell into mine perfectly, like a missing puzzle piece, and his head came to rest on my shoulder. Without a word, my arms returned the embrace and we sat quietly. I looked over at Kanji, who was facing my open door, clearing crying, his face buried deep into his hand.

It felt mind-numbing to hold Yosuke's body in mine once again, but Kanji was the only one crying in the room that afternoon. I just breathed evenly with Yosuke in my arms for what felt like an hour, although it was probably only about five minutes. When he finally pulled away, he looked me in the eyes with an expression that only asked one question.

"Souji…?" he said, and that was all. His face asked what his voice didn't, and I let my eyes fall shut, sighing in frustration.

"There… aren't words…" I began, my voice breaking a little, "…for how sorry I am."

Still in my lap, Yosuke shifted a little and let his face fall against my neck. "I forgive you," he said quietly, his voice muffled by my skin. I noticed, then, that Kanji had left the room, perhaps to either leave the house or just go downstairs. I didn't know, and didn't really care at that point.

"How the hell can you forgive me, just like that? Like I didn't do anything at all?" I asked my questions as one of my arms wrapped around his waist. My voice was completely calm, and oddly enough, so was my mind. Being so close to him was just enough to make things normal again.

"You seem to be forgetting that I'm the one that left you," Yosuke said, a smile in his soft tone. "Not on purpose… but I abandoned you." He placed a small, light, cautious kiss on my neck that made me shiver.

"That wasn't your fault," I breathed. "In the end, I'm the one that didn't stay faithful."

Yosuke hesitated. "B-but… I… I'm still…" He nuzzled his head further into me. What was he trying to say…? "…still in love, with you."

"I lo—" I began, but I cut myself off before I said anything else. "Well… you already know." I spoke quietly, referring to when Yosuke had first spoken to me, and also, the re-confession that Yosuke had accidentally heard over the phone.

"Nothing's changed, in my eyes," he replied. "I… I was mad for a little while. I wasn't eating much, and I started having weird dreams. But I couldn't stand being mad at you. When Kanji told me we were going to see you, my heart felt like it was going to stop. I was so afraid you were going to reject me."

_I was about to be surprised, until I remembered exactly what I'd said to him at the hospital._

_"Yosuke, Souji and me are going out," Chie said, a small, apologetic smile on her face._

_Worse than I imagined, the look on Yosuke's face reflected a miserable confusion._

_"Wh...what?" he said, sounding a little breathless now. He let go of my hand and it suddenly felt torturously cold. "S-S-Souji? I... I don't get it..."_

_"Yosuke..." I whispered. "I'm so, so sorry."_

_"But you... you said you love me!" he said, sounding horribly insecure. "The last thing I remember before this God-damned coma was you, kissing me. And even just now..."_

_I looked over at Kanji, who had a look of melancholy in his eyes. If he ever were to be disappointed in me, it was definitely now._

_"You said you loved me too!" I could see tears beginning to swell in Yosuke's eyes, and it broke my heart. "Did you lie?" he demanded._

_It was a real question that deserved an honest answer, but could I manage to tell him? To reveal the truth to Chie?_

_"I didn't lie," I said finally, and I felt Chie's grip on my hand tighten._

_"What?" she said, sounding confused._

_"But, Yosuke," I said, my voice now doing as it pleased without permission from my heart. "I've moved on. I'll love you forever, but Chie is my girlfriend now. I'm sorry."_

_Once I saw it, I couldn't get Yosuke's expression out of my head. He looked so hurt that it pained even me, and I couldn't bear to look. I let go of Chie's hand and I turned to leave as Kanji tried to stop me._

_"Souji!" he called, but I didn't turn around._

"I thought_you_ were going to reject _me_," I said, my voice still calm as ever. "I thought you would be mad. If not for all I did while you were in the hospital… then, at least for the last two months."

Yosuke squeezed me tighter. "Most of the time… I wasn't mad at you. I was sad. Hurt. Frustrated. But not mad. The whole time, I was only thinking about how badly I wanted to see you."

"That's how I've spent the last eight months," I said, the sentence coming out incredibly soft. "I… I felt so lost without you."

'I'm not going to leave you anymore," Yosuke said quickly. "I-I mean, that is… if you still—"

Before he could finish his sentence, I angled my head and caught his lips in the most long-awaited kiss the universe had ever seen. Without a moment's hesitation, Yosuke's lips began working with mine. It was the same eager kiss I'd come to expect from my boyfriend, only better. I licked his upper lip lightly and he accepted me willingly, so I proceeded to kiss him silly. Our tongues wrestled for nearly ten minutes before a voice in my door startled us both.

"Don't get too comfortable." We separated swiftly, and before I turned to look at the invader, I couldn't help but notice Yosuke's wonderfully deep blush. Looking toward my door now, it appeared that Kanji had decided to stay, after all. "Dojima is home." I could see the clear, giddy smile on our friend's face. I knew he'd been rooting for us the whole time.

"Thanks, Kanji," I said, a smile on my face as Yosuke climbed off my lap sheepishly. "For everything." He just grinned back at me with a smile of unconditional friendship, regardless of all the shit I'd put him through.

Yosuke held out his hand and I grabbed it happily, standing with his help, and we followed Kanji downstairs to greet Dojima and Nanako. When they walked through the door, we were just coming to the last step of the stairs, and I smiled at the two genuinely. I casually snaked my arm around Yosuke's waist and pulled him closer to me. Nanako looked confused for a moment before she burst into an excited grin and sped over to hug Yosuke around his torso.

"Yosuke!" she squealed, and I looked up to meet Dojima's suspicious eye. I didn't really _want_ to know what he thought of my arm being around Yosuke's waist, but the conversation would come eventually… hopefully it would be much later. Thankfully, for now he appeared to ignore it.

"It's good to see you up and about, Hanamura," he said, a tired smile forming on his lips. "You look healthy as a horse."

Hugging Nanako back, Yosuke grinned at Dojima. "Thanks," he replied as Nanako pulled back and turned to wave at Kanji as well.

For the first time in a long time, things felt normal. Better than normal.

"Wow—Teddie? Really?"

"Wh-why do you sound so surprised?"

"Well, I don't know. I guess that I just thought you'd turn out to like chicks… y'know. After all you did to prove yourself back in the TV."

"Hey, don't judge," I said, squeezing Yosuke's slim figure closer to me. "You were a serious homophobe in those days. Now, just look at you."

Yosuke rolled his eyes and Kanji laughed lightly. It had been three days since Yosuke and I had made up, and although we hadn't gotten any time alone yet, we were both happy, and closer than ever. We were at Junes with Kanji that day, catching Yosuke up on everything that had happened. Our conversation began to wander toward Kanji's little crush, as Yosuke hadn't been informed yet.

"Anyway, I think it's cute," I said. "You two would look really good together."

Yosuke raised an eyebrow. "Sure, but is Teddie going to go for it?"

"That's the problem," Kanji replied, his face falling a little. "I don't think he will."

"He'd be crazy not to!" I said, a slight laugh in my voice. "Kanji, you're the absolute greatest. There's no way Teddie wouldn't love you if you just told him how you feel and gave him some time."

"But—"

"But nothing," I said firmly, not letting Kanji rebut at all. "Yosuke and I will help you. Right, Yosuke?"

Yosuke laughed. "Yeah, alright. We'll help you get Teddie. I guess we kind of owe it to you, anyway."

"Definitely," I said. "I don't think we'd even be together if not for you, Kanji. You deserve love more than we do."

Kanji smiled weakly. "Thanks, you two," he said. "Hey, I'll be right back. I'm gonna head to the bathroom."

"Alright."

Kanji got up and began walking off, and once he was out of sight, I turned to face Yosuke with a smile.

"Think we'll be able to do it?" I asked, and Yosuke rolled his eyes at me.

"Well, you committed us to it," he said dryly. "I guess we'll have to give it a try."

I laced our fingers together with a wide grin. "Isn't anything possible through the power of love?" I asked with a chuckle.

"Eughh," he groaned, making a face. "How corny."

"I thought you said horny for a minute."

"Just shut up and kiss me, you goon," he commanded; and so I did.

**Said it before, I'll say it again. **_**Mission: Impossible**_**, the sequel, is already up, and a work-in-progress. It takes place where this story leaves off. I honestly hope you enjoyed this story! There were ups and downs, but all's well that ends well. ;) Review for me, baby, one last time.**


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